Antithesis
by myLink'sLady
Summary: Suppose it wasn't all sweetness and light once Naraku was destroyed.
1. Chapter 1

Antithesis

Chapter One Kagome.

Ten years had passed since Naraku's defeat and now two girls sat side by side lost in their thoughts. One nursed her young child; tenderly stroking the silver hair from the peacefully sleeping face, while the other held a tiny clawed hand in her own and wondered what it would be like to hold her own babe. The chance had been lost five years before and would never be regained, at least not with the man she still loved but had betrayed.

She had not betrayed him with another; no one else had known the secrets of her body, her betrayal was nothing he could fight against. She wondered not for the first time how everything had gone so wrong; she could trace the events but not always her reasons and now it was too late to turn back the clock.

Kagome thought back to those dark days inside the Shikon Jewel when she was alone with just the cruel cold whispering in her mind. The jewel knew she really wished to go home, but Inuyasha had reached her and saved her sanity by helping her to form the wish for the jewel to vanish completely. But because her wish was selfless, a more gentle whisper had told her she would have her own wish too and the well had appeared and allowed her home in any case; although it took Inuyasha away.

She missed Inuyasha every day for three long years during which time she finished her education and lived mainly as most young girls do in the latter teenage years; studying hard, playing well and earning pocket money from part time jobs. Then that marvellous day when she was finished with school and her thoughts turned seriously once again to Inuyasha's absence in her life, the well had surged with power again and opened the portal.

She never questioned why it had allowed her back, perhaps it had something to do with her heartfelt wish to go home and finish her education _before_ becoming Inuyasha's mate that she'd had deep inside. Whatever; the miracle had occurred and she was welcomed back into his very loving arms and back into the lives of Miroku, Sango and all the children.

Everything had been fine as she became Inuyasha's mate with her own hut and housekeeping. She'd helped out Kaede and teased Sesshoumaru when he visited with Rin and sparred with Inuyasha, and she'd played with Sango's children and chatted as a housewife while their men went and earned their wages. There was always plenty to eat as grateful villagers would pay in kind for her miko services and she was always cheerful and willing to help, much as her incarnation had been.

They had found that the well was not permanently opened as it had been before, but all they had to do was wish to return and it recognised the desire that had been granted to the holder of the Shikon jewel and her guardian mate. So now Kagome had the best of both worlds literally and found she enjoyed both equally. At least at first, but soon the novelty wore off; Inuyasha could be away a week or more at a time, Sango had her hands full and there was no real joy in washing and scrubbing by hand instead of machine.

Her hands were becoming rough and calloused again as they often were when fighting Naraku, but that had seemed a good reason at the time. Since she had been home, life had not been so tough and Kagome was feeling lonelier as time went by. She missed her friends when she was in the past and all the things they did together; with the evenings being the worst when Inuyasha and Miroku were away. Inuyasha couldn't help but notice his mate's growing despondency; she had started to use the rosary again if she thought he was being annoying or rude.

Sango had tried to reason with her friend, Inuyasha hadn't been 'sat' for three years and had never needed to be. But Kagome was not to be swayed, the hanyou was still often coarse and her mother was not used to such language when they went home, he needed to learn. Inuyasha did learn, he learnt that Kagome was actually much more contented in her own time than in his and he tried as a good mate should to make her happy, so he ended up staying with her for longer and longer.

But it was not easy; Kagome got frustrated with him often as he didn't want to do the things she did all the time, hanging out with her friends at the mall shopping or enduring the overloud sappy films at the cinema with his ears permanently covered was not working out. Why could he not try to fit in with her life more, instead of bucking against it all the time? She had tried to fit in with his life, wearing the clothes of the time however strange; yet Inuyasha hated to dress in modern things.

Of course neither she nor her mate could carry on living at her mother's expense as they had done while she was a schoolgirl, and therefore Kagome had found an office job where her knowledge of antiquities was fast becoming recognised. Inuyasha also needed to work, it was his job as her mate to provide but this was harder to find; he took on heavy lifting jobs and other unskilled labour because he had no other credentials and couldn't read or write much.

The money they brought in combined was enough to pay for the rent of a couple of rooms on the shrine site that had been transformed from an office especially for them to be independent of the main house. But because her responsibilities didn't allow her to take a few weeks off here and there, visits to the past became few and far between limited to the weekends and when they were not socialising.

Pretty soon the strain was beginning to show, money was tight and eaten up by bills and shopping and Kagome didn't see why she couldn't go out with her friends as much as she used to, she worked hard enough. But she hadn't fully taken into account her mate's nature; he still was over protective of her and possessive, it was part of being an Inu hanyou and any time that he heard bad news about girls attacked or raped, he would drop whatever he was doing to come and check that she was alright.

At first it was sweet and thoughtful, but it cost him several jobs and eventually, the rest of her colleagues were finding it funny and laughing at her expense and Kagome started to be embarrassed. It didn't matter how often she explained that she was safe, the modern world was so strange to him that he found it imperative to protect her from it.

Usually Kagome could vent out frustration at her mother who could see it always from Inuyasha's point of view as well, having seen the pair of them growing up for a few years. Mama was worried for them though, Inuyasha also talked to her and had confided that Kagome had been pushing him away and he was confused; he had so much passion for her, but she was refusing him more and more.

It all came to a head after they had been together for a couple of years, Kagome had rushed into the kitchen of the shrine in tears to see her mother, complaining that once again Inuyasha had lost his job as he wasn't there when she got to is place of work. Mama said that she was jumping to conclusions only to have Kagome start to wail. Her mother asked what the real matter was.

"I had to go to see the doctor today, I passed out at work; he says I am stressed. What a laugh after all I have been through in the last few years, he says I should take it easy for a bit."

"Why not have a holiday, go and see your friends in the past and slow your pace down a bit?"

"No, Mama; we can't afford to take time off, money is so tight as it is and Inuyasha doesn't help by keep losing his jobs. No wonder I am stressed; thank the gods it wasn't because I was pregnant."

"Inuyasha would love you to have children Kagome, he would make a wonderful father and I know he is looking forward to it."

"We can't afford kids Mama we have to wait."

"You will never be able to afford children darling, it's one of life's mysteries."

"Well not now, I want to live a little before I settle down to having a family besides…"

"Besides..?"

"What would we do with hanyou children Mama, how could I hide them for the longest time what they were; they would have to have to have hats on permanently and suppose they lost control of their youkai, what then? I don't think I can risk it; it wouldn't be fair on them."

"Kagome have you spoken to Inuyasha about this?"

"Of course not, he wants pups and won't understand; he doesn't know I'm having birth control shots, but eventually he'll just accept we can't have them. It's incredible really, but I do now understand Kikyou; things would be so much better if Inuyasha was human."

"Kagome!" Her mother was shocked and Kagome grinned ruefully.

"Perhaps I can purify him on a regular basis maybe that would get rid of his youkai." She was only half joking and sounded bitter especially to the shocked hanyou standing by the door. Inuyasha had come and stood waiting while his mate spoke with her mother, neither of whom had noticed him as he was so quiet. He held in his hand a considerable amount of money which he slowly put on the table.

Kagome felt guilty and afraid of what he had heard and lashed out angrily asking him where he had got such a large sum and to take it back where he'd got it from. There was silence for a long time and Mama got up to draw him to the table, she could see the horror in his eyes and knew he had heard all of Kagome's unguarded words. But Inuyasha was shaking now and pulled away;

"I ain't no thief Kagome, the money's mine but I give it to you…be happy." Then he rushed out and down the well before anyone could stop him. Grandfather was nearly bowled over in the passageway but came in to see what the others thought of Inuyasha's good news. Mama asked him to explain as Inuyasha was not there and the old man told them that Inuyasha had been making intricate carvings from fallen trees and making benches and chairs from them.

An exclusive shop's representatives had been visiting the shrine and offered to buy the benches and any more that Inuyasha made or to make him a contract for a percentage of what they sold for. It would be at the very least a respectable and regular income with the possibility of even more. It was now time for Kagome to feel guilty; she would have to make amends and she too rushed out to the well and the past.

But Inuyasha was not to be found, he was not with Miroku and Sango, they had not seen him although Miroku knew that he had activated the well and he was not at Kaede's or their own hut. Kagome waited and decided to cook a delicious stew with which to apologise to her mate and help him calm down knowing that he would soon scent her and the dinner and come to her as he always did.

Kagome waited three days and still no sign of the hanyou, she later found out that he had returned to her mother and told her that he was leaving and that he would free her daughter to marry in the human tradition. Should she wish to mate another youkai that would have to wait till he was dead. Mama tried to speak with him but could tell that this time Kagome had gone too far, her soul had not changed in all this time and had hurt Inuyasha to the very depths of his being. All Mama could do was assure him of her love and let him know he would be free to come to see her whenever he wished.

Kagome had hardly seen him again; she had visited far more often with Sango and Kaede and become friendly enough with Rin, but only ever glimpsed Inuyasha when he came back with Miroku or Kohaku who had been helping his brother in law during Inuyasha's absences in the future. They had spoken once when Inuyasha had freed her telling her the same things he had said to her mother. He had said that this wasn't just about pups was it, she had deceived him and she had not been able to deny she would now prefer him human. Inuyasha had not been able to forget her scent which spoke of her embarrassment of the things he did because he was hanyou.

Then one day when she came he had gone, left the village for good. No one knew where he had gone although he had said goodbye and Miroku said he would not be dissuaded. It seemed that he too had had a wish from the kindly voice inside the darkness as had Kagome; although apart from the fact he had not believed it until it had come true, he was warned not to speak of it in case it went wrong.

When it became obvious to everyone that something different had occurred, Inuyasha was already decided, and he left the house with all the things in it to Kagome before slipping away. None of them saw him again; he spoke lastly with his brother and vanished into the forest while no one was watching him.

TBC


	2. Rin

Chapter 2 Rin

The baby yawned and started to awaken making the soft little sounds that preceded a full blown squall; youkai babies used the same means to get attention as human ones it seemed. Rin sat and rocked the child gently hoping to settle him again, but in vain and Kagome gasped as she saw the golden eyes open for the first time. He looked just like her Inuyasha, except that his pointed ears were perfectly balanced on the sides of his head; but without the markings of his sire, the face was that of his uncle.

The pup had the same wide golden eyes and rounded cheeks as Inuyasha and Kagome ached to hold him, but he had awoken for a feed and Rin put him to her breast before he had the chance to exercise his lungs. She remarked to Rin that the pup had no markings and was informed that they would develop gradually as the youki strengthened and proved him strong enough to live. He was not yet a month old but the parents had no doubts that he would be strong.

It was a mystery to Kagome and as yet unexplained, how Rin had been able to give a full youkai child to Sesshoumaru and not a hanyou; although she was surmising the pup was full youkai only because he did not have puppy ears. Perhaps he _was_ hanyou; she had not reached out with her senses yet to see, partly because it would be rude to do so and partly because since she'd been searching for her mate, her senses were too distraught and often played her false.

It had been two years since Inuyasha left the village and no one had seen or heard of him; and in desperation Kagome had come to the West to plead with Sesshoumaru. She had been welcomed by Rin and was now awaiting his Lordship nervously as she sat with his Lady and heir. Kagome knew that despite appearances, Sesshoumaru did concern himself with Inuyasha's welfare and would not be pleased with how she had acted; but her desire to find her mate superseded her fear of retribution at his brother's hands.

The as yet nameless pup was soon replete and although sleepy was alert and watching the new face that showed such great interest in him and he suddenly smiled at her and reached out. Kagome's eyes filled at the display and she asked could she hold him and the child was immediately placed in her careful arms. Rin already knew of the reason Kagome was still childless and it had made her and her own mate furious at the deception the Miko had used, even if Sesshoumaru could understand why she didn't want hanyou pups.

Sesshoumaru's pup would receive his name on his naming day, until then he was known as The Heir; and at the moment he was sniffing at Kagome familiarising himself with her scent and still smiling that disarming smile. But soon he was seeking his mother again as Kagome's tears were starting to unsettle him. Kagome needed to take her mind off all that was happening and begged Rin to tell her of the days in the village when the well had been sealed.

So she did, telling of the people from her own perspective and what it had been like to live and work with Kaede and just waiting for her Lord to return. But when it came to telling Kagome how Inuyasha had been, it had become difficult for her. Rin could say in general terms how he had built his hut near to Kaede and that the Miko had cooked his evening meal for him from the food that Inuyasha had provided, and which always left plenty for the two females as well, but not a lot more.

He spent a lot of time with his other friends taking delight in the children and working with Miroku and he would often spar with Sesshoumaru for an hour or so when he visited Rin but that was all she could say. Most of this Kagome knew, she wanted to know how he had been in himself and he had most often been with Kaede and Rin when away from Miroku's family for the evenings at least. Rin laughed humourlessly, if Inuyasha wanted to speak to Kaede she went to his hut, he wouldn't speak around Rin at all because he hated her and always had.

Kagome couldn't believe her and immediately jumped to Inuyasha's defence; how could Rin believe that, he had never done anything to hurt the child. Rin concurred, Inuyasha had never hurt her but nonetheless she knew he hated her and she didn't blame him as she understood why. Kagome needed convincing however, as she had never seen signs from her mate before of hatred to anyone apart from Naraku really; anger definitely, but hatred towards such a sweet little child that Rin had always been was impossible for her to imagine.

"Kagome I was orphaned when I was about five years old and for a couple of years until Sesshoumaru found me and I him; I was barely tolerated or cared for by the people of my village. I starved and froze and lay awake at night scared and alone and I recognise the look in another who had done the same. The first time I looked at Inuyasha's face and saw his eyes, I knew that he understood; but he has always been overly polite to me, never familiar as with those he considers his friends.

"Of course I was too young to put into words what I knew at the time, but I tried to be friendly to him. He would never smile when he saw me in the way that the rest of you did on our journey and I met you so infrequently that I ignored his glare, but when I stayed here and the well closed it became more obvious and I finally realised what was so familiar. I too knew the expression I saw on his face, I had felt my face contort the same way and I remembered what had caused it.

"I would stand on the edge of the village and watch as children played, sometimes I played too but when it was time to go home everyone else was called by their parents for dinner. They would run to loving arms and welcoming smiles, leaving me to my dingy damp hut by the river; or maybe someone would come and show off a new kimono or toy and I would feel my face contort as my jealousy flared. It is that expression I recognise on Inuyasha's face whenever he catches sight of me."

"Why would he be jealous Rin, he had been through the same things, perhaps it was a form of anger that such a small child would suffer as he had? He has a kind heart beneath that gruff exterior."

"I admit that I didn't know myself at first, it was Kaede who told me; one day I had made dinner from the rabbits Inuyasha had supplied but he refused it saying he was not hungry. Kaede took it back to him later and he threw it out of the door almost screaming at Kaede that he wouldn't eat anything that I had touched. It was then that I knew he hated me and it was Kaede who told me why.

"While it was true that we had some shared background experiences, Inuyasha had suffered for far longer than I had and then I was given everything that he had always wanted and needed for himself. Sesshoumaru rescued me, cared for me and provided for me, even loved me in his way. I wanted for nothing as a child in his care and he still came by to see me and bring me gifts while I stayed at Kaede's.

"I received all that Inuyasha should have had from his brother and yet I was nothing to him, certainly I had no right to any consideration, while the child that did have a legitimate claim was completely degraded. It might have not mattered so much if Inuyasha had despised Sesshoumaru, but he didn't; once I knew, I could see it for myself.

"Later of course, Sesshoumaru improved their relationship somewhat, he would seek Inuyasha out to train him; but it was too little too late, the pup was too old for gifts and wouldn't be content on our picnics and yet inside he wished for both. I told Sesshoumaru that I thought it would have been better if Inuyasha had been born a girl as he wouldn't have been treated the same way by my Lord, something that he has never denied."

Well that did make sense to Kagome; she knew that Inuyasha resented his brother's callous treatment all of his life, but she had never considered that he would feel jealous hatred for the young girl. Something she said however seemed strange;

"Pup Rin? You call him a pup, do you mean as in child?"

"In my mate's eyes, that is all he is; youkai age so differently to humans, he's not a child as such, more of an adolescent."

"I miss him Rin and I want him back so badly; I don't know what he's been doing or where he is, Sesshoumaru is my only hope." Kagome whispered looking up when Sesshoumaru answered her coldly.

"I can tell you what my brother has been doing since your soul rejected him as a hanyou for the second time; when he finally stopped weeping in the arms of the old Miko, he left to live on his own and became a virtual recluse."

"I did not reject him Sesshoumaru, I made a mistake and said stupid things; I didn't know he was listening and I was unwell, stressed out. I didn't mean any of the things I said."

"You did intend to deceive him over your ability to have pups and that lack of trust in him to understand your concerns has done far more damage than you know. You were thoughtless and selfish and only thinking of yourself; you did not even try to discuss solutions with him or your mother and brought all your stresses upon yourself. My brother freed you from him by leaving you, but he condemned himself to a life of loneliness compounded by his lack of self worth and his wish from the jewel."

Kagome got to her knees in front of the Daiyoukai surprising him, although it did not show; the girl had never shown him the respect he deserved.

"I beg you Sesshoumaru please let me see him, I know he is here, let me try to make amends, I will die without him, I love him so much." Her pleas did not fall on deaf ears, but the Lord made no move to accede to her request.

"We have both greatly harmed Inuyasha, Miko, I will not do so again; and you are wrong my dear," he said to Rin; "Inuyasha does not hate you personally, but only the position you had at my side. He would not have been so generous had he hated you yourself."

"What was his wish Sesshoumaru, what did he ask for?" Kagome was anxious to know, had he become full youkai after all? "He never told me he had a wish; he hadn't used it when he was with me."

"He didn't know if it was a true visitation or just a dream, but he was most cautious in case it proved correct and he was informed that it was best to tell nobody in case it was never required. Inuyasha made his wish about a year after the well closed. At the time he reasoned that your wish was to stay with your family and so he didn't try to jeopardise that by making a selfish wish and nobody else seemed to need anything immediately.

"The wish was selfless and more than generous given the circumstances and was fulfilled two years ago. Inuyasha hoped that should both Rin and I wish that she was youkai and not human, that it should be granted. He was told that it was not possible for Rin to just become something she was not, the power could only enhance natural attributes and so he offered his own youki which was acceptable and transferred it to Rin under the same condition."

"You mean Rin is youkai now?"

"Not quite, her organs are enhanced with Inuyasha's youki and therefore will live as a youkai and can reproduce and heal as a youkai. Because of the unique situation Rin is a unique being, but it has meant that I have the mate I desired and my full youkai heir because of my brother's generosity."

"But why would Inuyasha run away, were you angry with him for doing this?"

"No, I was…surprised and not considerate of how my words would be taken given our past dealings; I told him how worthy Rin would be using his youki. Inuyasha misunderstood my meaning; he felt I was insulting his own worth again. I did not realise this until later when your friend the slayer made the remark that perhaps now he could go back to you and would be more acceptable, now he was human.

"I do not think she meant that either in the way that my brother took it; he stood screaming that he was still the same person inside that he always had been, but obviously that was not good enough for anybody. He then barricaded himself in his hut refusing to come out or speak with anyone except the old Miko. But even she was unable this time to console him and that night he left the village and has been living alone since."

"But he is here."

"By default not choice, he has been living in a cave well hidden behind a waterfall set into a cliff. He has existed barely scraping a living and refusing my assistance. I wished him to come and live here where I could be assured at least of his health, but his mistrust is far too engrained. I do not understand human melodramatics and so I did not insist, he knew where I was should he require me."

"He is human, he needed you to insist; you said he is like a child Rin, you would have known he needed to feel wanted, Sesshoumaru you should have persisted, taken him away if necessary ."

"Perhaps; as I said we have all contributed to Inuyasha's state now. I will not allow you to see him just because you love him now he is human."

"I don't, I love my hanyou; human, youkai and combined and I'd give anything to turn back the clock and start again. I can't bear the thought of all he has been through yet again. Please let me see him, let me explain how much he means to me."

"You cannot, there is nothing to say to Inuyasha anymore." Sesshoumaru's tone was solemn and he came to Kagome and placed in her hands the rosary from around Inuyasha's neck. Kagome's eyes widened in horror and before she fell into an unconscious state on the floor she vaguely heard Sesshoumaru say;

"Inuyasha died five minutes before you arrived."

TBC


	3. Sesshoumaru

Chapter 3 Sesshoumaru

Rin's eyes overflowed with tears as she looked at her mate; she could tell that his brother's death had hit him hard even if he barely showed it. She knew every nuance on Sesshoumaru's face and could read his eyes, she was the only one who could and had done since she'd made him her study after she found herself following him years ago.

They stared at one another, words superfluous at the time and Sesshoumaru bent to pick up Kagome and take her to the chamber where his brother lay. As they waited for Kagome to come round Sesshoumaru took his pup from Rin and compared the two boys. One human and dark, the other youkai and fair but the face shape was the same and unlined, asleep in death, Inuyasha looked not much older than the baby asleep in his Sire's arms.

The birth of his own child had given Sesshoumaru insight as to how his father could be willing to give his own life in behalf of his child. Now Inuyasha had gone on ahead, given up his wearisome fight for survival and no longer had to bear the hatred of a world that did not accept him. He was a pup who had lost his mother too soon and far too young, Sesshoumaru hoped that he would find her again; it was the last thing that Inuyasha had wanted.

It was the least he could do for his baby brother; having done precious little else for him during his lifetime, except run him down and make his life more of a misery than it already was. At least Inuyasha didn't die alone; the boy's greatest fear was that no one would care or be with him when he drew his last breath. Inuyasha may not have believed in the sincerity of Sesshoumaru's words of apology to him as he lay in his brother's arms at the end, but at least he was warm and comforted as much as possible. He did not feel the last kiss bestowed upon his forehead though as Sesshoumaru held him to his breast and watched as his violet eyes closed for the last time.

Blinking the sudden moisture from his own eyes that those fleeting memories had wrought, the Daiyoukai snuffled at his son and was reassured of the new life that had barely begun as his uncle's life ended. For the first time Sesshoumaru thought it was a tragedy and waste that Inuyasha had died not knowing that his wench truly did love him. The girl did not lie and from his own observation Sesshoumaru knew that they had always loved one another, but had an appalling record of communication.

He noticed Kagome was coming round and that Rin had knelt beside her in order to help and comfort her. He was expecting a scream of grief as she remembered and was prepared for the stormy tears that he knew her capable of producing. But she did none of these things. Kagome got up alone and made her way to the side of her mate. He looked so small in the bed and had lost a lot of weight since she had seen him last; but his face was peaceful and framed with his black slightly wavy hair. She stroked him gently;

"Oh Inuyasha you are so beautiful, but where are your pretty ears and your golden eyes? I never meant any of those things I said; don't leave me my love, please don't go away so far." Tears were streaming down her face now and she had forgotten she was not alone as she kissed him and recoiled at the coldness beneath her lips. Rin put her hand on Kagome's shoulder attempting to pull her away but to no avail.

"What happened Sesshoumaru, why is my Inuyasha dead?"

"He was injured in his weakened state and had no desire to fight and stay alive; he wanted to die."

"No; no, he would never wish to die." Kagome stared at the Daiyoukai who sighed and told her all they knew.

"I had a guard put on watch over Inuyasha while he lived in the cave, the foolish boy would not defend himself or keep a look out; he hardly ate or slept and was unused to how far he could push a human body before it would collapse. He was also prey to various illnesses that he hadn't lived through as a normal human would have done and his immune system was compromised often, but most noticeable was the lack of lustre in his eyes; Inuyasha was existing, but not living."

"When I visited he no longer sought to annoy me by word or deed but would listen most…obediently; he had given up his personality and now believed all he had heard about his lack of worth in everybody's eyes. It was most unsatisfactory and I believed he didn't care whether I was there or not. I stopped visiting so as not to inconvenience him any more."

Kagome heard what the Daiyoukai did not say; he did not like to see his brother in such a depressed state but hadn't known how to help him beyond making sure he was safeguarded. Inuyasha would have fared better if Sesshoumaru had insisted imperiously as he usually did, that Inuyasha obey him and go to the West. But the Daiyoukai had erred in the wrong direction this time, in trying to make amends with his young brother he had let him be; probably contributing to the hanyou's feeling that nobody wanted him.

It was not Sesshoumaru's fault, tragically he didn't know how a human boy would think or feel; but why was Inuyasha here now? Sesshoumaru actually sighed.

"My mate took a fancy to travel personally to the nearest market town to 'shop' herself, instead of having the traders come to her. I agreed the excursion would be pleasant and it was arranged. Because of the inherent danger of travelling with our newly born son we were well guarded and many came to know we were abroad and crowds had formed.

"It was a beautiful day, propitious for taking our time which we did and we spent several hours while Rin browsed and spoke with the townsfolk. On our way back I noticed the very familiar red of Inuyasha's firerat beneath a hedge, he was battered and unconscious. It seems that he had come wanting to see the pup but had got too close and been knocked out of the way by one of my attendants.

"Unfortunately he was in such a weakened state by lack of care that the blow had caused serious damage and by the time he was brought back here there was not much more to be done for him bar making him comfortable."

"Please bring him back Sesshoumaru; please use Tenseiga, give him back to me, let me make amends please." Kagome begged not caring who saw her kneeling at the feet of her brother in law or aware of the mess she looked with her soaked face, reddened eyes and dishevelled hair. Kagome had no pride left now when it came to begging for Inuyasha's life.

"I will not Miko; Inuyasha was most specific in not wanting me to revive him. I will honour his last request." He looked calmly down on Kagome, whose eyes flared with anger.

"He is finally where you have always wanted him isn't he; leaving you the sole survivor of your father's legacy. You heartless bastard; even with all the things you made him suffer he was still a better person than you will ever be. I can't imagine what your great father would have thought of you and I hope one day you find out." Kagome was beside herself; spitting the words out and unconcerned that she might be raising the wrath of the Daiyoukai as she was struggling to free herself from Rin's arms.

He didn't answer or try to defend himself against her tirade, recognising the root validity of her assumptions;(although he thought that Inuyasha was a better person than the Miko as well,) but she had not been there in the last hours that Inuyasha was lucid and he had been quite certain that his brother was resolved to die.

"You will listen to me Miko, I will tell you what transpired between my brother and I; perhaps you deserve this knowledge and perhaps not, but you will listen and not interrupt. Speaking out of turn is one of your failings; the overuse of the rosary was your greatest. I will not deny my faults where it comes to Inuyasha but neither should you, it took you too long time to request my aid; no doubt you have umpteen excuses for this but it matters not to me and now it matters not to my brother."

This was going to be hard for Kagome to hear but she deserved every searing word as far as Sesshoumaru was concerned; she could give it out and now it was her turn to take it.

_FLASHBACK_

Sesshoumaru entered the room that was now Inuyasha's chamber when the boy awoke after being seen by the healers; carrying his son in his arms. He went and sat on the edge of the bed and assisted Inuyasha to sit leaned against him, then placed the pup into his arms. He was beautiful and grinned a huge toothless grin at his uncle who was smiling back; tears running down his face.

"Finally eh Sesshoumaru, you found some use for my worthless life; my youki has returned to its rightful owner. You should be proud of him; he is all you could ever want."

"Inuyasha it is inappropriate for you to denigrate yourself; it was not something that I should have done either. Had I considered you worthless in reality I would never have left my ward in your care."

"Feh! Shame I never knew her secret; still I'm glad it worked. At least she has always wanted you, never any doubts there."

"Your Miko loves you too, of that I have no doubts also. I know what you said before but you two have the worst communication skills."

"I know I'm no good with words and Kagome and me both jump to conclusions before we finish speaking; but it hurts Sesshoumaru, she didn't trust me about pups, she was going to deceive me all the time. Does someone do that to a loved one? I've been gone two years and she hasn't come…"

"Does she think you really don't want her anymore, you released her from her bond did you not?"

"I would have looked for her."

"We are driven in different ways to humans Inuyasha."

"I have been human for two years."

"But you are still hanyou in thought and wasn't that a deception of your own? You did not tell your mate that you had wished your youki away before she returned to you."

"I wasn't 'sposed to say."

"I doubt Kagome would have said anything to endanger the wish; you really are the limit, the pair of you."

"Well it don't matter anyhow now; it's over, just look after your pup, he looks a worthy descendent of father even if I weren't."

"Inuyasha I said desist in such talk; it is neither proper, nor conducive to your healing."

"It don't matter no more; didn't you talk to the healers, I'm dying, two more hours tops and the stain on your bloodline will be eradicated." Inuyasha looked down at his tiny nephew who had gone to sleep cradled safely in the bedclothes between his uncle's knees. Sesshoumaru wasn't sure that he had heard Inuyasha correctly, it was true he could feel the boy leaning heavily on him and his breathing was quite shallow, but dying?

"Do not be so ridiculous brother, you are here in the safety of my Palace, the best healers are here and you will not go without anything you need."

"Even you can't forbid this brother and why would you try? It's the best solution all round; don't pretend that you care now." Inuyasha's voice was subdued and soft.

"I do care Inuyasha; you are my family."

"Don't do this to me Sesshoumaru; no one cares about me at all, I don't care about me. When I go… who knows, maybe Mama…I miss her Sesshoumaru; I know you don't understand, but she is the only one who's ever cared about me and not minded I'm hanyou and I want to be loved. I'm sick and tired of being alone always, I don't want to carry on no more. I'm ready to go."

"No, you will not think along these lines anymore; I shall fetch my healers…"

"It's no use, I ain't got youkai healing no more and my body is closing down. Just do me a last favour will you?" Inuyasha reached gingerly into his breast pocket and pulled out a ribbon and a small old red ball. "Please tie the ribbon round the ball and give it to Kagome if you ever see her again. Ask her to give it to her Mama; she is the only other one who has always accepted me and was always kind. Tell her she reminded me of my own Mama who gave me the ball that is tied with her ribbon. It's all I got that's mine except for Tessaiga which is for you. Take it by the scabbard, although maybe it will let you hold it now that you have a human to protect."

Inuyasha slumped in Sesshoumaru's arms after his speech which was exhausting for him and felt he must have been hallucinating as he felt calm, leaning against his brother's breast. It seemed to his obviously deluded mind that Sesshoumaru had wrapped his tail around both Inuyasha and the pup and was gently wiping away the now human's tears.

"Sorry Sesshoumaru; damned human emotions, too weak, shame you."

"I am not shamed by you Inuyasha; rest a while, I can support you." Sesshoumaru was easing the breathing of Inuyasha by keeping him upright and helping him to stay semi conscious. He tied the ribbon round the ball as he'd been asked but did not touch Tessaiga, although he thought a great deal about Inuyasha's words. When the healers came in to check on the boy, they spoke in soft tones to their Lord who at one point gripped his brother hard and said _'it is not possible, This Sesshoumaru will not allow Inuyasha's death on these terms.'_

There was a gentle knock on the door and Rin entered to take the pup out, neither she not Sesshoumaru failed to notice that Inuyasha had turned his head away from her as she did so which caused a look of extreme sadness to fall across the young mother's face. Sesshoumaru smiled slightly at her to raise her spirits but did not chide his brother for his rudeness towards the Lady of the West.

When Inuyasha's life force started to wane it was apparent to Sesshoumaru that there was nothing he could do except call for Jaken to collect Tenseiga. Inuyasha roused slightly when Jaken returned in time to see the handover of the powerful life-giving sword. He put his hand out to stop it.

"I don't want you to use Tenseiga brother. There is nothing for me to live for, we both know that. Hell you can even say you killed me and restored your family honour by not reviving me with it."

"Ridiculous Inuyasha; now lie still and when the time comes there will be no pain."

"Don't use it please Sesshoumaru, there will be no pain in my death anyway. I just want my Mama again. Let me have that at least; I won't be a bother to you much longer." The two boys stared at each other and Sesshoumaru nodded stroking his brother's hair gently with his claws.

"I will miss you Little Brother." He said ignoring the pain he felt at the thought of Inuyasha finally being gone from his life and the sharp agony that he was not believed as the boy shook his head in denial. Sesshoumaru could only hold his brother's gaze making sure that Inuyasha could see his regret until the younger sibling's eyes faded and finally closed, with his last breath a mere whisper.

As the Daiyoukai continued to hold onto his brother's body his mind flashed back to all of the times he told Inuyasha that he should be dead, that his very existence was a waste of the air he breathed and he realised how petty and cruel he had always been to his brother who was still only a young pup. He was still meditating when he heard the arrival of the fire cat and his late brother's mate.

Straightening the bed around Inuyasha and placing their father's fangs either side of him, Sesshoumaru did the final thing he could, and that was to remove the rosary which came away easily now the life sustaining it was gone. Inuyasha now looked just like his round cheeked baby nephew, Sesshoumaru thought; easily colouring the black mane silver, but he found his eyes misted over when he tried to put the puppy ears back in his mind. Taking a final look at Inuyasha he blinked and went to speak with the Miko.

_END OF FLASHBACK_

Now his attention was turned once again to the distraught woman sitting on the deathbed of her one time mate. There was no denying the genuine nature of her grief; she had absorbed all that she had heard and was holding tightly to Inuyasha's hand and had the beribboned ball on her lap. Her mother would be heartbroken to receive that gift and yet Kagome knew it was appropriate; Mama had always accepted Inuyasha with no question and that had made an indelible impression on the lonely young hanyou.

"I'm sorry Sesshoumaru; I had no right to say those things to you, I was wrong. It's unfair, I do so want him back."

"Miko, he is human; he hates to be human, it would be unfair to bring him back against his own desires."

"He died under misapprehensions, he was ill and felt alone; that could be changed for him, please. You didn't want him to die either Sesshoumaru did you? Together we could make it worth his while to live, I know we could."

"True he loves you and he still loves me and yet neither of us fully deserves it from him. But ask yourself this, should we call the pup back from where he may be happy with his mother; can we offer him a better alternative? Would we be doing this for him or for ourselves, to assuage our own guilt? Sesshoumaru was unusually thoughtful and speaking to himself mainly, and he was well aware of the slight but regular pulse from Tenseiga that was serving at the moment to keep the death imps away from Inuyasha as well as asking to be used.

TBC


	4. Inuyasha

Chapter 4 Inuyasha

The young prince was put down for his nap by the nursemaid who had come to take him from his mother, blissfully too young to understand the distress around him. Suddenly there was another sound of woe coming from the bed and the wails of Myouga became evident. He had just flown in on a sparrow that was still perched on the window sill and the tiny flea retainer had just seen that his young master was indeed dead.

Sparing no more than a glance at the flea who was patting Inuyasha's face gently as if trying to rouse him, Sesshoumaru turned to Kagome and said;

"I cannot do it Kagome; I am truly sorry and I would have brought my brother back to this family where he belongs. However apart from his own wish to the contrary, he will be human, a condition that he hates and fears. I would not be so cruel."

"Why _**is**_ my master still human Lord Sesshoumaru; how did this come to pass?"

"Myouga, you were informed of how Rin came to be my mate; I know that Inuyasha told you of how he used his youki for her."

"He mentioned something yes, but he told me to leave him when he left the village; I have mainly been travelling since and now I come back to this tragedy. I don't understand why he is still human."

"Because he gave Rin his youki via the wish he had from the time of the jewel." Sesshoumaru was showing more than his usual patience towards the flea; understanding for once the liberties were not intended to be disrespectful to him, but were born from confusion and grief.

"Well yes My Lord, I understand that; but he did not form the wish in a way that would make him become human himself. With great respect to Lord Inuyasha, he would not have thought of going into enough detail as to get rid of his youkai makeup, and he would never have specified becoming human. His blood is no different to when he suffers his human night; the youkai is still present although lying dormant inside. I know this because I tasted it when his transformation occurred and when Rin gained his youki. Your mate received all the youki in his body at the time the wish was fulfilled, but not its source. It was as if he'd been purified… but it should have come back."

They all stared at the tiny youkai who dearly loved an audience when he was pontificating. Rin asked him to take a sample of her blood which he was only too willing to do.

"Yes, your blood is delicious as always Lady Rin, but the youki wrapped around your vital organs is transforming as it should do to become more like your mate's. This is normal after all, the more you…get closer in a physical way the more your youki is renewed; eventually your youki will not bear Inuyasha's signature."

"But the jewel didn't purify Inuyasha."

"No indeed Lady Kagome, and that must be the key; but his youkai _is _stilldormant in his blood, I did taste it one moonless night when he was unaware I had come back and he wouldn't get upset with me."

"Jaken, see to rooms for Lady Kagome and the rest of you leave; This Sesshoumaru needs to think without interruption." He was obeyed instantly, even Kagome having the good sense to obey him without question. As soon as the room was cleared the Daiyoukai went to sit on the bed next to his brother and contemplated the face lying on the pillow. He placed his hand against the ivory cheek that was cool to the touch and remembered the brilliant lively eyes and high colour of the animated person Inuyasha had been.

This facsimile of peace and calm was so wrong for his baby brother who should be mischievous and cocky and full of life; not pale, serene and dead. The pup had died in a human despair; against his brother's better judgement and with that in mind, Sesshoumaru picked up Tenseiga and in one vicious sweeping arc he sliced through the death imps with a ferocious growl. Then he raised Inuyasha's head and slid behind him so that he was supporting his brother when he came back to consciousness.

Inuyasha awoke in the same position as he had died, his eyes locked on to his brother and Sesshoumaru knew it would take a few moments for Inuyasha to re-orientate and realise he had been revived. He also knew the exact moment that it occurred as Inuyasha turned his head away from the intense amber gaze of his brother. Sesshoumaru said nothing until the salty tang of tears assaulted his nose and as they did so, he too recognised that the scent had not changed from any other human time in Inuyasha's life. They had never been completely human in character even on the moonless night.

"Do not weep Inuyasha; be not angry with This Sesshoumaru." He waited but there was no answer and no abating of the tears."Had you really wished to stay wherever you were Inuyasha, Tenseiga would not have worked." Sesshoumaru omitted to mention that he had kept the death imps away from Inuyasha with Tenseiga, thereby leaving the boy in the unconscious sleep of death from where he could be recalled.

"Look at me child." The unusual expression had the desired effect and caused Inuyasha to turn his face back to look at Sesshoumaru, who was displeased but not surprised at the bleak countenance of his baby brother. Inuyasha's violet eyes never left his as Sesshoumaru ran his claws through the ebony tresses slowly and deliberately, noting the missing puppy ears. He had been expecting a more vociferous reaction; even if somewhat subdued, due to the time needed to rally after being brought back from death.

But Inuyasha still just stared allowing his brother complete control over him; not that he could have physically stopped Sesshoumaru doing anything but he offered no resistance at all. He just kept staring, those damnable tears still falling and all Sesshoumaru could do was feel hopeless in the situation. That thought made the elder feel angry, suppose this were his pup in such a state, what would he do?

As he was thinking, Sesshoumaru's tail came round to wrap the boy closer to him in warmth and he tightened his grip around his brother's body offering the security of his strength, before trying to wipe the tears from Inuyasha's face. He surprised not only himself by the display of care, even affection; but Inuyasha too was unable to resist responding and laid his head under his brother's chin and brought his hand up to feel the steady youkai heartbeat. All things that were instinctively done in asking for comfort and safety and they were granted; making him feel that he belonged for the first time, in his brother's life.

"Inuyasha;" the tone was quiet and gentle as it seemed Sesshoumaru was also new to this way of coaxing rather than ordering his brother."Pup will you listen to me and let me explain why I restored you?" His answer was in Inuyasha clinging closer but no verbal answer; it was obvious the boy was feeling vulnerable but was unresisting, and Sesshoumaru missed the ears that would have told him that his brother was listening by their unceasing movement.

"It has been brought to my attention that I allowed you to die without full knowledge of your state of being." Sesshoumaru didn't know why this was so hard to say, speaking of the whelp's death had never troubled him before; but then he hadn't had to face it in reality before either. "Inuyasha we were all under the impression you had become human; but it seems…according to Myouga, that such is not the case. Your Youkai is still present but lying dormant in your blood, much as on the moonless night, but unlike that night, daybreak did not return your youkai."

By now Inuyasha's strength had returned; Tenseiga had healed his body, not just given him his life and he pulled away from Sesshoumaru and rose to stand over by the window. Sesshoumaru gave him time to compose himself and soon Inuyasha came back and sat by his brother, wrapping his arms around himself.

"Will you not speak Inuyasha?"

"What is there to say; your mate has my youki yet I still have it too; I don't understand, it makes no sense and obviously no difference. I am still human and my situation is unchanged; I live again but for what purpose? I had hoped you would leave me; it was what we both wanted wasn't it?"

"No, Inuyasha; death was not for you, there are things you are entitled to know, perhaps there is a way we can restore your youkai."

"Why bother? Human, hanyou or youkai there is nothing left for me and nobody who wants me around; I don't even remember if I saw my mother or not, perhaps she too does not wish to see me." He sounded sad but Sesshoumaru recognised self pity when he heard it and even if Inuyasha was entitled to wallow in misery, his brother was not going to allow it.

"You did not reach that far Inuyasha; Tenseiga had not let you go completely and you are wrong, there are those who care for you. I ask that you give this second chance a month; if you still wish to die I will allow it and kill you myself, I can do so painlessly and Tenseiga does not work a second time to bring life back." He watched as Inuyasha nodded slowly and said;

"Very well".

"I have to inform you that I withheld information from both yourself and Kagome. She has been searching for you ever since you left the village on her visits, but I have made sure that neither I nor Kohaku was ever available to assist her. I was most angry at the way she had treated you, her mate; and you did not wish to see anyone either. It has been brought to my attention however that I may have made a mistake by not fully understanding how humans rationalise.

"I was informed that you might have been more contented had I insisted you come here to live and not done as you requested and left you alone. Inuyasha you are still only a pup in youkai terms and I wish to be more responsible for you as our Father wanted. I require that you live here where you will be cared for as my younger brother and with all due respect and honour to your position."

Inuyasha went over to the window once again trying to process all that Sesshoumaru had said. He had no trouble in accepting his brother's terms, at worst it would only be for a month; he felt slight anger at the knowledge that he hadn't known that Kagome had been looking for him but it wouldn't change the outcome of anything so what was the point?

Sesshoumaru recognised the classic signs of depression that Inuyasha was giving off; apathy was very unusual in his brother but it could be reversed. At the moment the boy was isolated and that would have to stop, Sesshoumaru really didn't want to be put in the position of ending his life again, this time without hope of reprieve.

"Inuyasha, Kagome is here; Kilala must have been apart from Kohaku, perhaps visiting the female and Kagome has asked her help in reaching me. She has gone up marginally in my opinion; her persistence that you be revived and her despair in how things had gone between you are genuine. She cannot hide the truth from me and neither can you. I know you have never stopped loving her and that is your business; however I must insist that from now on if you wish to establish a relationship of any sort it will be under my auspices."

"I'm sorry Sesshoumaru, I am all mixed up at the moment; Kagome is here you say, but I freed her to find someone who would make her happy."

"She is totally free now Inuyasha, your death ended the mating bond. But she is here and doesn't fully realise that."

"I do not wish to see anyone yet Sesshoumaru."

"That is your prerogative at the moment; but I too have learnt Inuyasha and I will not allow you to stay alone for long and fall further into melancholy. I do care about you Inuyasha; I wish to be your brother in deed not just name." As Sesshoumaru left to order that some food should be brought to the chambers, Inuyasha felt strange at his brother's words. He could hear that they were genuine, besides his brother was not a liar; did Sesshoumaru really mean to accept him now and did Inuyasha want him too?

It took no time at all for his inner self to answer the question, he had always wanted his brother's love and regard, but the quiet voice was quickly swamped by the voice of reality and experience. But then what was a month, one moon cycle and either Sesshoumaru killed him again or he didn't; if he was messing with Inuyasha's mind it didn't matter anymore, he could survive another month. Sesshoumaru was no fool and he could read Inuyasha well, he knew that words meant nothing to the hanyou, unless proven with actions.

The pair ate from the food platters, Inuyasha was very hungry; Tenseiga had restored his ability to eat properly again and no matter how hard he tried to listen to caution, his brother's words and comfort had made it easier for him to keep the food down, just as they had restored his appetite. His spirits rose with the good food and sense of well being that was coursing through his body. Sesshoumaru noticed the fact that Inuyasha had relaxed a little more near him, but wisely kept his own council; he didn't want to scare the boy off and wanted to make him used to his company over time.

Therefore he intended to keep the talk light and off any painful subjects unless Inuyasha brought them up, but he didn't. So they spoke of the outlook over the garden from the suite of rooms they were in, and Sesshoumaru told Inuyasha that he could choose anything from around, if he wished to make them more comfortable. They spoke of the various foods they enjoyed and once again Sesshoumaru showed Inuyasha the bell he could ring, saying that someone would come to do his bidding; whether to supply food or drink or anything else he needed and at whatever time of day or night.

For the rest of the week, Inuyasha stayed in his room with Sesshoumaru and the small pup the only visitors. Kagome of course knew that he was once again alive but she had not pushed her boundaries by disobedience to Sesshoumaru this time. She respected that Inuyasha wished time to adjust and wanted to see him desperately, but she had been devastated when the Daiyoukai told her she had no rights to anything as she was no longer mated to his brother.

He told her to go home but she had pleaded to stay, he had asked how she would manage in her own time if she lost her job because she was not there. She said she didn't care; all that mattered to her was Inuyasha and her desire to make amends with him. She had realised what was important in her life and that was Inuyasha, nothing else was as vital as he and it didn't matter what they did anymore if they could only have another chance.

Sesshoumaru had tested her out knowing that she wished to see Inuyasha, by having her wait; he also had her watched to make sure that she didn't try to see the boy when he was not yet ready for her. Kagome's weight dropped and her hair started to lose its sheen and she spent many hours in tears in her palatial prison, away from the man she loved. But she did as requested; although she begged for any news from anyone who might have come in contact with the hanyou.

Neither Inuyasha nor Sesshoumaru were being deliberately cruel in their treatment of Kagome; Inuyasha was not yet ready to see anyone and Sesshoumaru was too busy with his brother and family to notice the girl who walked around like a ghost when she was out of her room. But one person did observe how everything was affecting the young woman; all too human Rin knew how Kagome was suffering and wanted to help.

One afternoon before her mate would visit with Inuyasha, she took her pup and went to knock on the shoji door to her brother in law's room. Swallowing nervously she entered on his call and the couple stared at each other like deer caught in the headlights. Rin recovered first and with her trademark smile she ignored his stiffness and offered the pup to him. The baby was already familiar with his uncle and grinned immediately, reaching out to the arms that were open to him.

"I have you to thank for my pup Inuyasha and yet so far you have not let me do so. In fact both Sesshoumaru and I owe you a great deal; you have given so much and yet received so little from us or anyone."

"It ain't important; the pup is strong and healthy. A good youkai pup."

"Inuyasha, please look at me; I don't believe you have ever spared me more than a passing glance, but I understand. I would really like to get to know you though." Rin was taking a risk she knew, but she wanted a real response from Inuyasha; not the cold politeness he usually favoured her with as he ignored her as soon as possible.

"There's nothing to know, I ain't interesting; I ain't my brother." Was the gruff, sulky reply.

"Inuyasha, what can I do to stop your hate of me? I am serious, I know why you detest the sight of me but please, we have both suffered enough hatred surely." Rin did not smile this time and her face was obviously sincere, at the moment she was no longer the happy carefree child Inuyasha remembered every other time he saw her.

"O.K; what was it like having my brother's love and care, was he kind to you or did he beat you if you smiled at him or tried to please him? What was it like to go to bed knowing you were safe and well fed under his wing and knowing nothing would harm you? You were always so cheerful and happy when you were with him… he made me the opposite."

"You know the answers to these questions Inuyasha; it is the reason for your hatred, you wanted what I had."

"You were not _entitled _to his care and love, it should have been mine and it never was; it never was… I wanted him so badly and all he did was throw me away time after time." To his horror tears were running down his face and he turned away from Rin, not wishing her to see the shame that the memories brought back to the surface. Rin went over to him however and placed her arms around his shoulders and didn't back off when he turned quickly, his arm raised over his head as if ready to strike out.

"I know Inuyasha and it hurts me that I can do nothing to take that pain away for you. But I wanted to ask you to think please, you have been given your life back again and all of us, your brother, your mate and your sister are asking you to give us all a new start in your life. We all love you dearly and don't want to see you hurting anymore, so please give us a chance; let us prove how much you mean to us."

Neither of them had youkai senses to tell them that Sesshoumaru had entered and approached them until his arms had encompassed the pair of them and the pup. He ignored Inuyasha who had started to pull away, still ashamed in front of Sesshoumaru because of his rebellious tears; but the Daiyoukai just gripped him more.

"If I could undo the damage I caused you in the past, know that I would do so; but we can only write the future together if you are willing Inuyasha. Do not hold my faults against Rin, she is not to blame for my conduct; I would have you friends if possible, if not now then sometime hence."

Inuyasha thought for a while and looked down on the smiling face of his nephew; noting that he still looked like he did, and thought it might be possible to try. He leaned his head on his brother's shoulder and Rin did too which gave Sesshoumaru a feeling of incredible strength as he felt his power intensify knowing that these members of his family and pack needed him for their happiness. Rin still had something to say however.

"Inuyasha, if we are all to start again and prove ourselves to you; please do not forget to include Kagome, she is becoming sick in her grief."

TBC


	5. Conversations

Chapter 5 Conversations

Before Sesshoumaru would allow Inuyasha to speak with Kagome he had a word of warning for his brother.

"I have watched you with the Miko before Inuyasha and I know that you still love her; but do not promise her anything just because she weeps over you. Inu nature is loyal and strong; the desire to obtain love from the one who beats them is well documented in the domestic animal, there is a similar disposition in the Inu Youkai."

"Really; how foolish can someone be Sesshoumaru?" Inuyasha replied sardonically; as he finally freed himself from his brother's embrace and went out into his garden. Rin sighed as Sesshoumaru finally realised what he had said; of course Inuyasha knew, he had kept going back to his brother for some affection or any recognition and been beaten away literally every time as a young pup. The Daiyoukai smiled ruefully at his mate and followed his brother into the garden. No time like the present to try for the fresh start Rin was speaking about.

"My words were ill considered Inuyasha; I did not mean to insult or offend you with what I said."

"I know; besides I was the idiot who kept trying, I was such a stupid pup I'm surprised I wasn't killed within the first month of being alone."

"Your survival proves you are not stupid Inuyasha."

"Yeah well, it's not just Inu; any kid'll hope that one day someone will care or be kind; I just took longer before I gave up, that makes me stupid."

"We will not continue this; it helps nobody and we are trying to start anew. So Inuyasha my brother, you need be alone no longer; this is your home and we your family, for as long as you wish. Come home and stay with us pup." He finished speaking and slowly approached Inuyasha; not fully knowing whether or not the boy would see the genuine offer, or suspiciously throw it back in his face. Would the beaten pup be willing to try one more time to find love and affection from the one who had callously tossed him away so often before?

Inuyasha flinched as the familiar desire rose in him to throw caution to the wind and put his faith in his brother; he wanted to turn round and bury himself in Sesshoumaru's arms and chest, longing to feel the safety and comfort of his older sibling. But his caution was hard learned and not to be discarded so easily; Inuyasha's instincts had betrayed him before where Sesshoumaru was concerned. So he turned slowly but held himself together and nodded at his brother; he could give him the rest of the month.

Sesshoumaru could tell what was passing in his younger brother's mind and he was frustrated, but could hardly blame the boy for not trusting him implicitly when he had just been warned about not doing the same with Kagome. Inuyasha had reached the end of his ability to cope with any more and it would have to be a gentle slope to convince him he was not putting his trust in futile hopes; Sesshoumaru hoped they would have enough time.

They both re- entered Inuyasha's rooms and the hanyou went of his own accord to Rin and asked to hold the pup; the little squirming baby seemed to have a calming influence on his uncle, almost as if the youkai existence of the child was the only worthwhile thing he had achieved in his life. Sesshoumaru wondered if his son might be the anchor Inuyasha needed to tie him to them firmly and keep his interests alive. Rin realised the same thing and thought that the child might serve as a welcome distraction for both Inuyasha and Kagome when the time came.

At dinner that evening Sesshoumaru took perverse delight in Kagome's appearance; she looked quite haggard and pale, her hair dull and she had lost considerable weight. It appeared that the last two years had taken their toll on her as well as his brother, which had just culminated in the drama of the last week. She looked much older than her early twenties as far as he could tell; but he was unconcerned, it was fitting that she suffered just as she had made Inuyasha suffer.

The obvious hypocrisy in his reasoning did not go unnoticed by Sesshoumaru; but that was for him to sort out, just as it was for the Miko if she could. She had seen Inuyasha or rather glimpsed him while he was unaware; although as he wore different kimono to his usual firerat and with his long ebony hair he was vaguely unfamiliar to her during the daylight. She longed to go to him, feel his arms around her but she was not allowed to approach; she had to wait until he was ready.

It was on one sunny afternoon and as Kagome sat on a bench in the gardens, Inuyasha after observing her for a few minutes came and sat down next to her. Kagome could not look up at him; she was afraid of what she would see in his face so she sat and studied his hands. All too human hands which were different to his hanyou ones in shape as well as in their lack of claws; they were smaller and more squared than his normal tapered fingers.

"This is how you prefer me isn't it Kagome" Even his voice was changed, softer but strangely more self assured than she remembered. But she shook her head before her whole body crumpled in on itself, as she couldn't hold her composure together anymore. Inuyasha was alive; but she had last seen him dead and before that, it was the time he had released her from their bond. Kagome had not believed him at first; she didn't think he could possibly be saying she was free of him and she was angry. How petty she had felt given all that had happened since; hurting him when she knew he was always vulnerable to self doubt beneath the surface.

Inuyasha pulled his ex- mate onto his lap and held her while she cried; he hated to see her so upset but he was determined not to be pulled into a trap however innocently it was set. Kagome too could feel the difference, his touch was similar to when they had first met; protective and safe but there was no hint of the more intimate and close bond they had shared at all. The final realisation that Inuyasha was no longer her mate was devastating and Kagome once again passed out.

Sesshoumaru appeared next to his brother and took the Miko from him, carrying her back to her rooms where he called the healer to look her over. While they waited outside, Sesshoumaru kept a visual check on his young sibling; he had been impressed with the way the boy had dealt so far with his mate but was also concerned. He had thought that he would have to slow things down between them knowing how forgiving his brother was; but it so far was not the case.

The healer came out and said that Kagome was exhausted and on the verge of a nervous breakdown; something would have to be done soon if she wasn't to suffer a harmful illness. At the moment she was lying in a disturbing dream that concerned the hanyou and not wanting him to change. None of them needed to be told that Kagome was not faking her depression and the surrounding consequences; they were all Inu and could sense the Miko's distress. They went in to see her looking incredibly small in the futon and Inuyasha leant down to kiss her cheek before Sesshoumaru asked him to accompany him on a walk.

When they had reached a private and secluded glade Sesshoumaru stopped and bade his brother sit with him.

"Inuyasha do you trust me?" This was a loaded question and Inuyasha was not sure of its importance, only that it was. Did he trust his brother? Well for many things definitely yes; Sesshoumaru was not a liar, but when it came to Inuyasha, the elder boy wanted a personal trust. Inuyasha recognised what Sesshoumaru was asking, but he didn't know if he wanted to admit that he did yet; too many times the hanyou had fallen prey to wishful thinking where the two of them were concerned.

"I want to Sesshoumaru; but…it is hard…"

"I have done nothing to make you lose faith in me; however I have acted towards you before Inuyasha."

"Its not that…I don't trust easily whoever it is. I've been let down so often."

"Inuyasha, we don't have much time; ideally I would try to gain your trust so that you believed my words but I am going to have to ask you to think about this seriously for the next few days. Kagome is ill and becoming and getting more so, just as you did; she will have to go back to her home soon and decisions must be made. You have only a couple of weeks to make a vital decision too and I do not want it to be the wrong one."

Inuyasha actually smiled; trust Sesshoumaru to put the facts in brutal black and white, he was making no concessions to his brother's humanity by being gentle. But it was safe and Inuyasha knew that he could personally trust Sesshoumaru, he didn't need a few days to think about it; he'd trusted his gut instinct long before anything else.

"I trust you brother; I don't need any more time."

"Are you sure Inuyasha?"

"Feh! Like you said, you've never played me false; even the unmother…well enough about that, and besides if you are playing me false I won't have to worry long."

"I won't _'play you false'_ as you put it, pup; believe me Inuyasha, when I tell you that I do want to go forward with you at my side as my father's son. I know there are many things to overcome but some must be addressed now." Sesshoumaru was pleased to see Inuyasha nodding slightly in agreement.

"O.K. I'll bite; what do you want to say?"

"Little Brother, Do you wish to take the Miko as your mate again?"

"Damnit Sesshoumaru; I thought I was the tactless one."

"Your female does not have time for procrastination pup; if you do not wish to try again with her she needs to be sent to her own home now, where she can be healed according to her kind and where I understand she has an anxious mother waiting."

"I dunno Sesshoumaru; it ain't up to me anyhow, it never really was. I did what I thought or felt and it was wrong. I can't and won't put her through it again; but I can't live under only her ideas, she pulls me in different directions and something will give."

"I understand child."

"Sesshoumaru, I hate being human all the time; more than anyone knows so please call me pup again, not child." Inuyasha got a smile and an incline to the head from Sesshoumaru as answer as the Youkai got up and went back inside leaving Inuyasha to think on his own.

Inside, Rin was visiting Kagome and the two were playing with the pup; he was adorable and very social unlike his Sire but then Kagome thought, she didn't really know how the Daiyoukai acted at home.

"How did it get to be such a mess Rin, if I could only turn back the clock I would do so in a heartbeat." Kagome gasped as she became aware of Sesshoumaru.

"And how far would you turn it back Miko; to what point would you wish to erase the life you have lived?"

"To the point when I thought I would rather have my life in the future because the novelty was wearing off the past. Back to where Inuyasha and I were happy and in love, without stupid false ideals of what it means to be successful; where you must have this and must be that."

"These were things Inuyasha wanted too?"

"No, that's just the point; he didn't understand, in my time his ideas are so old-fashioned and women don't want to be looked after all the time. I wanted to go out and do things with my friends; instead I was tied to earning the money and resented not being able to spend it on what I wanted. I finally grew up when I realised I had lost the one thing that was most important in my life…" She broke into sobs and leaned into Rin.

"Well one thing is in his favour at least, he is human; you would have no need to purify him anymore, that would spare him much pain as purification over and over would cause him to suffer greatly." Sesshoumaru's cold voice broke in over the wails of Kagome, but she reacted as he hoped she would.

"I didn't mean any of that; none of it at all. I was speaking with my mother alone or so I thought. I was stressed and when humans are upset they say all sorts of things they don't mean. Inuyasha should have known that; how often did we both say horrid things to each other while we travelled together in search of the shards? Why did he take it so wrong this time, he knows I never meant it before?"

"This time you were _mates_, you were preventing his pups without his knowledge which is a betrayal to any mate including human ones; apart from showing you lacked trust in him. Then you come up with a solution he had heard and rejected already in his life before accusing him of theft when he showed you he was able to provide you with the currency of your time. Have I missed anything out? He did the only thing possible to him as an honourable Inu and that was to release you from your bond and then by his death he set you free completely."

"I don't want to be free of Inuyasha, I want to be his mate; I love him, I need my hanyou back." Kagome was beginning to shout."Don't you understand, I made a dreadful horrendous mistake and it cost his life but I am selfish I just want him back to start again…but I don't know what to do; Inuyasha probably hates me now?"

"My brother could never hate you Miko, once he gave you his heart; Inu's are fiercely loyal, but he is afraid. If he went back to the life you offered it would slowly kill him again and I could not revive him a second time with Tenseiga. I will not permit you to do this."

"I don't want that life Sesshoumaru."

"I have proposals for you both; I too understand regret over past incidents surrounding my brother. We have all agreed so far to put the past as behind us as is possible and start anew. Inuyasha however will be the one who has to give the most in this regard as he was the one most wronged; and it will mean change at _his_ pace and with _his _agreement only. This is my pledge to him and my father; I will not be gainsaid in this."

"Just tell me what to do."

"You must wait again for him to come to you; my brother is still…fragile in mind and I need to find out how to bring his youkai back to his normal state. This will be your last chance Miko, Inuyasha hates being human, do you have anything to say."

"No, please he should be hanyou; I have loved him as such since I first set eyes on him." She watched feeling more relieved as Sesshoumaru exited the room carrying his pup again. The Lord of the West met Inuyasha and gave the pup over to him;

"You heard all of Kagome's word and innermost thoughts Inuyasha; she is not lying or deceiving herself this time. I was cruel to her, because I knew you could not be, but I will not apologise; she gave me the answers you needed."

"I understood, do you really think you can awaken my youkai again?"

"Yes, my advisors have been studying in the library and think they know what we should do."

"Tell me?"

"It is very simple; I just need to call your youkai and you must accept This Sesshoumaru as alpha. To some extent you already do so I foresee no great difficulties."

"What would it mean to me though Sesshoumaru?"

"As your alpha I would have to have your obedience in any of my final decisions. I am Lord of these Lands by right of birth and by deed, but I am not a tyrant and am reasonable. You would not find it so hard. But in personal things, I am older than you and would also require a certain degree of respect for my authority and decisions. I would need your trust Inuyasha ,there is no other way. I have to mark you as pack; that will be the 'call' needed and your youkai will respond to it, but it makes you family not a slave.

"I would belong here properly; be part of the family? Do_ you_ want that?"

"Yes Inuyasha, it is time our father's children stood united; do you not agree? Give me my pup before you drown him with what I trust are your tears of happiness." Sesshoumaru teased, taking his small laughing son in one arm while he comforted Inuyasha with the other by stroking his hair. By Inuyasha accepting his terms, Sesshoumaru was certain he could stop the boy's desire to end his life; the hanyou Inuyasha was not emotional like the human and could be reasoned with in more youkai ways.

He didn't know it yet, Inuyasha still thought he had the final say in his life but it was not so; Sesshoumaru had always been able to manipulate the pup and he knew that the boy's own youkai already did accept him as his Alpha; the moment the hanyou turned youkai had been subdued by his brother after the incident with the bandits, the youkai would have no other option but to recognise he had been overcome.

That evening for the first time, everyone met for the main meal in the dining hall and the atmosphere was calm but not strained. Rin was chatty and engaged Kagome as much as she could and even Inuyasha was caught up sometimes with her optimism. Sesshoumaru watched calmly or pretended his son was not pulling on his hair trying to gain his Papa's attention. After the meal Sesshoumaru indicated that it would be an appropriate time to try to stimulate Inuyasha's youkai. Inuyasha nodded but then turned to Kagome and asked;

"Kagome, in your heart which would _**you **_prefer; do you wish me a hanyou or would you rather I stayed human? Tell me truthfully, I will know if you are not honest." He gave no indication of what her answer would mean for him and watched as she came over to him and sat in his lap. She spoke plainly to him but also loud enough to be clear in her declaration to others.

"I love you human and I love you youkai, but I love you most as hanyou and I always have. I know I hurt you so much but it was not my intention, you must believe me. If this works and I hope it does, I will be very happy for you most of all because I know you hate being a human. However if it does not, I will still love you, I will always love you even if you can no longer love me."

Inuyasha did not doubt her and even though he could not sense in the same way he could as a hanyou, Sesshoumaru was in no doubt. He merely gave a fraction of a nod at Inuyasha who smiled in relief. Kagome had a sudden thought,

"If I had said I preferred the human...?"

"I would have said goodbye to you at the well for certain; when I first made my wish, I thought that you had gone forever anyway and that as a human I would soon die. I gave my wish for Sesshoumaru because he is my brother, rather than waste it and I have not regretted it. Only I would have known how much my human life would have appalled me if the trouble had not come on us. But now with a chance to regain my youkai, I will not let that pass for anybody, not even you."

"It is about time you did something purely for yourself Inuyasha and not just because it pleases others." Sesshoumaru said proudly; "Come Little Brother it is time."

TBC


	6. Resolutions

Chapter 6 Resolutions

Sesshoumaru led Inuyasha to the healer's quarters and left Rin and Kagome to put the pup to bed and then wait for them in the living room area. It was not something that either brother wanted to be witnessed, except for the healer who also being Inu might have to come in useful. Sesshoumaru wanted it to be private between them and although he said the answer was simple, actually doing it might not be so.

It would be nothing for the Daiyoukai's strength to merely grip Inuyasha tightly and force his head down so that he could plunge his fangs deep into the human's neck. It would prove his dominance; but it was not needed. Inuyasha wasn't afraid of his brother, although he was cautious and Sesshoumaru didn't want his fear; he wanted his trust as he knew he had the boy's love deep down.

No Sesshoumaru was going to be patient and enjoy this time with Inuyasha, make it a good bonding experience and use it as a basis for their future. The healer was going to stay out of the way unless it became obvious that he was needed by either of the brothers. When everything was calm except for the nerves of Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru put his hands to his brother's face; noticing that the boy did not flinch or show even subconscious alarm at having the deadly weapons so close to his vulnerable neck.

"I need your undivided attention pup and I also want you to tell me once again that I have your trust."

"Do you need my trust, or won't you help me without it?" Inuyasha's large violet eyes gazed into his brother's sharp amber ones. They were open, childlike, but trusting and Sesshoumaru vowed not to betray his baby brother ever again. He smiled at Inuyasha, a genuine smile as one brother to another, with no malice or hidden agenda and he received a similar one back.

"I will help you with or without your trust Inuyasha, it's just that it will help with your youkai and also I would welcome it myself."

"I trust you Sesshoumaru; no one's forcing you to help me." There was however a tremor of emotion in his voice which his brother understood; this was very important for Inuyasha.

"This is not a gift I give to you Little Brother; the pack mark is your right and should have been given as soon as possible after your birth. I regret the fact you suffered for so long without protection or recognition, and I ask that you put aside any hatred that you harbour me for the transgressions I have committed towards you. In this I know I ask a great deal, but I do ask so that we can be united in our aims."

"I don't hate you Sesshoumaru; I never have, I always wanted you to…" He could go no further before he was embraced by his brother who held him tightly. Sesshoumaru knew that Inuyasha was forgiving but had never fully appreciated the need the boy had had for acceptance; that is until he saw the eyes of his human brother fill with tears, knowing that he was now a welcome member of his brother's family.

Sesshoumaru felt guilty and this was most uncomfortable for him, normally he could justify his actions to himself, but this time he failed. So he just held Inuyasha close until he was calmer, and made no derogatory comment. Although when the pup looked away from him in shame, Sesshoumaru turned him back to face him and wiped his face dry with his sleeve; coaxing out a self conscious smile from the younger.

"Sorry, human lack of control."

"Don't be sorry Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru was not condescending, even though he noticed that Inuyasha had not said the feelings were alien to him in his hanyou form; normally they were _'damned human emotions'. _This made Sesshoumaru sure that his brother would soon be assimilated into the family; he wanted it and was too warm a personality to stay on the outskirts, especially if he was near Rin and the pup. It would make Sesshoumaru's plans work out easier.

But it was time to see if they could waken the youkai and once again Sesshoumaru placed his hands on his brother's face. This time he used a light touch to stroke the human's cheeks and get him used to the feeling of goodwill, as he didn't want Inuyasha alarmed or worse, afraid. And it was why he wanted no audience as he wanted no possible misunderstanding of what he was doing. Keeping his eyes firmly fixed on Inuyasha he watched for any sign of discomfort and found none, even when the next stage was to run his claws through his brother's hair.

Inuyasha stared back with absolute trust which astonished and humbled the elder, making him realise once again how young the pup was and how vulnerable. He needed to be trained and to be given education and yet Inuyasha had survived many years alone. He was not gullible in every aspect and on his own admission he did not trust easily; but his youth was shown up in the fact that when he did, he was whole hearted and that is what caused all his grief.

Inuyasha liked the feeling of the claws raking through his hair making his scalp tingle, and vaguely remembered his mother doing it for him when he was sleepy. In fact, now his knees felt wobbly and as if he would fall; but before any such indignity could happen, he found himself seated in his brother's lap.

Now he was pressed with his back to Sesshoumaru's chest and he could hear and feel a deep sonorous rumble coming from the Daiyoukai; which filled the room with its resonance. Inuyasha vaguely thought he should feel intimidated and afraid; his hackles erect on the back of his neck, but it was not so. Almost the opposite effect was happening, he felt safe and secure with his brother's hands now on his shoulders and neck.

Next Sesshoumaru lowered the growl until it was almost a sensuous sound; deeply personal for them and reassuring the younger boy of the love from his brother. Sesshoumaru was surprised at how easy it had been for him to do this as he could only produce such sound if he genuinely cared for Inuyasha. He knew that intellectually he could say he cared and loved him, but on the deeper emotional level he had not yet been so sure. Obviously he did and once Inuyasha was relaxed he was able to move his brother's hair and shirt baring the boy's neck and shoulder.

Sesshoumaru wanted to build up a proper family relationship with his brother; something the boy had been lacking all of his life and that required a lot more than merely biting him. A true Inu pack was close and tactile; something that had been sadly lacking for both boys and something that Sesshoumaru now sought to change, hi s mating with Rin had shown him the benefits of closer emotional ties with loved ones.

But by taking his time and preparing the pup, Sesshoumaru was also finding out how much his brother wanted to belong and how far his trust would go. He was astonished that Inuyasha's sense of loyalty was absolute towards him; he had promised that he would have faith in his brother and so far he had not baulked at anything Sesshoumaru had done. He even had his back turned with his brother's deadly claws near his throat. Even when the youkai had been preparing his neck and pushing down hard enough with his tongue to cause the nerves to numb somewhat, Inuyasha had complied.

The growl was much lower now in tone and seemed to speak directly to somewhere deep inside Inuyasha, pulling a long inhuman whine from his throat and that was the signal Sesshoumaru was waiting for. He plunged his lengthened fangs into the side of Inuyasha's throat and held on; driving his heavily scented saliva deep into the puncture wounds that would turn into his mark and prepared for a violent reaction.

He got one as Inuyasha's body squirmed in his lap as if he was having a fit. Rapidly the boy changed from human to full youkai in a matter of seconds; the change causing him great pain, making him scream and then pass out while still held firmly by the neck. When the convulsing stopped Sesshoumaru released his fangs carefully and waited for the youkai to come around. Soon a pair of luminous red and blue eyes were staring back at him and Inuyasha started to speak in a lower voice than normal;

"I do not feel the urge to kill you." There was an element of surprise in the sombre words.

"Good, that is how it should be Inuyasha; I have marked you as pack and you recognise me as your alpha. Do you understand what this means?"

"I understand."

"The mark will help you be in control, but I will also see that you are trained in how to cope with your youkai."

"You will train me?"

"Yes, training will help you to not lose yourself irrevocably to your blood and teach you to balance your internal heritage."

"I have never known that peace; my mind is always at difference with itself. Training will help me in this?"

"It will; and now you should be safe from being in the situations that call forth your youkai to protect your life. You are marked as pack; my scent confirms this, my brother." As he spoke Inuyasha seemed to pulse and his eyes turned golden and his aura was less assertive, he was hanyou again and slightly unsure. He received a swift hug by way of assurance and Sesshoumaru asked if he remembered what had happened.

Inuyasha did remember, including his time as youkai; but the boy was nervous again, uncertain of his brother who had held nothing but derision for him for so long. Sensing his slight turmoil, Sesshoumaru once more held him close and said;

"What do you feel when I do this?" He ran his tongue over the mark on Inuyasha's neck which had already started to heal and smirked when his brother was startled. "Does it calm and reassure you to feel my mark? It is meant to affirm your place in the pack. I am sorry if it is unnerving to you; it would not of course, had I done this when you were born."

Inuyasha was quickly feeling overpowered by strong emotion once again; the sense of belonging was almost too much for him to bear, certainly not with any equilibrium. Sesshoumaru just stayed still as Inuyasha hid his eyes behind his fringe trying to stop the tears from falling, even if they flooded his eyes. He heard his brother chuckle but without malice, and then a square of silk was dangling in front of his nose.

"This is more convenient to use than your sleeve Inuyasha; easier for the laundry servants as well."

"Thanks; I'm sorry…" Inuyasha said before he turned into his brother's embrace once again but this time the tears were too much to contain. He was comforted however by the soothing stroking of his hair and ears; something he had sorely missed since he had become human or even longer. As he was calming down, the healer approached and checked Inuyasha over; taking note of his new mark and his strongly protected aura.

He confirmed to Sesshoumaru that the mark had taken properly and there was no sign of rejection; which was the only concern in an adult marking that was not a mating mark. Pack bonding was hard to do, as so much trust was involved on both sides; the more trust there was, the easier for the mark to establish.

"Congratulations my Lords, the bonding is successful and so is the restoration of Inuyasha's original being." The healer produced a tray of fruit and meat for them as their energies were depleted and needed restoring and indeed once they had eaten, they felt refreshed and strengthened enough to face the girls.

There was no doubting the genuine smiles that Kagome and Rin sported on seeing Inuyasha as he more naturally was, the golden eyed, silver haired hanyou with puppy ears. Shyly he held out both hands and invited each girl to come to him; Rin was overjoyed, this was the first sign of acceptance that Inuyasha had volunteered to her. Kagome too came with tears running down her face, at least she hadn't destroyed his friendship for her.

That evening was a quiet celebration made easier by the pup's obvious confusion about his uncle's, new for him, appearance. Thankfully he also was already using his nose and there was enough familiarity about Inuyasha's scent for him to not be too disturbed. Tentatively the conversations eased and there was even some gentle laughter. All in all it seemed a perfect time for Sesshoumaru to set the boundaries for Kagome and Inuyasha.

"As guardian of my brother, I have decided that should you both wish to have a serious relationship again, you must court one another as from the beginning. Inuyasha will live here in order to train and be educated as Father would have wished. The West is his home and you Kagome will be welcome to visit at the weekends, under mine or Rin's company. I shall write to Lady Higurashi to inform her of my decision and if she agrees Inuyasha may visit for a week at a time under her company. I believe her to be a woman of honour and will trust her word that she will keep the agreement."

He waited for the exclamations from either of them that he was being officious or high handed as would have certainly happened before the couple had their troubles. But there was silence as both digested the implications of the Lord's words. For Inuyasha it felt surprisingly easy to let Sesshoumaru make decisions for him and it was not just the mark which prompted obedience to his alpha; it was nice to feel someone cared.

He had a home and a fresh start and the feeling was welcome; Sesshoumaru's terms were reasonable, as if he were the young brother who was just starting out. It was a relief to hand the responsibility over. He went to his brother and sat on the floor next to him and leant his head against Sesshoumaru's leg in silent submission.

"How say you Miko? Have you given any more thought to a new future with Inuyasha?"

"I would be happy to live in this time and just visit my family; pups would not be a problem with people here who are used to youkai. I would do _anything_ you ask to have another chance with Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru."

"That is good; for mine are the only terms with which you may now meet with Inuyasha. Tomorrow we will escort you to the well so that you may return home; Inuyasha may accompany you and stay for a couple of days only, while you settle down to where you are going to live." Sesshoumaru was still waiting for the familiar objections, but they didn't come and he was pleased. Inuyasha must fully trust him and even if Kagome did not, his brother was the only one that mattered.

Sesshoumaru wasn't concerned with the lack of fight from Inuyasha about his life being decided for him or anything so ridiculous; the pup would learn in time the limits and the freedoms of being a member of a loving Inu pack. There would be guidelines and firm boundaries as in all good families, but he would not lose his personality, only his fears; just as it should be.

The next day they all made their way to the village where there were emotional reunions with Sango and Miroku. None of them went into detail about what had happened in the last two years; those were tales to be told at a later date, especially as Inuyasha was a little shy around Sango who he had last heard mention that it was better when he was human. But it was Sango who drew him back into the conversations and smiled as her children made a beeline for their friend who they remembered and had missed.

Soon it was time for the travellers to return through the well and with stern instructions that Inuyasha was to be back in two days, Sesshoumaru let them go while he and Rin prepared to spend the time in Inuyasha's Forest. They were both looking forward to revisiting old times, but now with their pup; it would be almost like a small holiday and away from the confines of the court.

Kagome was nervous; her mother would be worried from the length of time she'd been away and also she had the letter from Sesshoumaru to hand over. It reminded the Miko of a bad school report which was not going to be well received. It didn't matter that she was an adult either to her mother; Kagome was always her daughter and she was already disappointed in her. The only mollifying thing about the whole business was walking behind her, lost in his own world at the moment.

"You go in Kagome, I'm gonna wait out in Goshinboku; yer Mama will be pleased to see you home." He jumped up high into the friendly branches of the tree and looked out at the view; he couldn't say he had missed the modern time, but he had missed some of the people. One of whom had just come out and was standing at the bottom of the tree looking up at him. Mama was calling him.

"Come down this instant Inuyasha or I will take my hairbrush to your backside." She called sweetly, but very firmly. Not willing to put the long suffering woman that he loved to the test, and knowing that however mild she appeared, she had a will of steel and would carry out her threat; he came down gracefully out of the tree to stand next to her. In the next second he was enveloped in a hug that belied her normal human strength and she burst into tears.

Inuyasha was completely shocked; this was a side of the normally calm, nothing could faze Mama he had never seen before. So he did what he would do for Kagome when she was sad and returned the hug, gently rocking until Mama started to calm down. She eventually pulled away from him and wiped her eyes then looked into his face.

"Don't you ever, _**ever**_ do anything as stupid as that again; running off for years and then…I know all that has happened to you and I am so angry with you and Kagome, and so relieved to have you back…I don't know if I'm coming or going. My darling boy, I could have lost you forever. She sat down and held him close as Inuyasha was overcome with the love he felt from her and the guilt that she had suffered. He wept unreservedly in her arms knowing that Mama wouldn't look down on him; her words of love totally unmanning him for the time.

TBC


	7. Progression

Chapter 7 Progression

Inuyasha didn't want to let Mama go; she was comforting and safe, very like his brother had become for him and he didn't want her to stop calling him her 'child' and her 'darling son' as she soothed him. He could tell that she meant the words; they were addressed right to him and not casually said, Mama considered Inuyasha as her own. This was the longest time that Mama had ever held him; certainly there had been others, but mainly just a quick comfort cuddle when Kagome did not understand him.

All too soon though Mama was straightening him up and his moments of being a child again were over. Inuyasha wiped his eyes and Mama went back into the house leaving the hanyou sitting beneath the tree. He thought on all that had happened but it was too much, he was not ready to make life changing decisions yet and was glad that Sesshoumaru had taken the responsibility for him.

He swiped his sleeve across his nose and eyes again to help clear his senses and heard a deep chuckle. Inuyasha quickly hid behind his fringe but felt a hand gently scratch the base of his ears and claws rake through his hair. Then a bundle of soft white paper was thrust under his hair and wiped over his face.

"Tissues are even more convenient than silk squares and far superior to your sleeve Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru smiled as finally Inuyasha looked up at him. The differences were only subtle, but they were enough to show that Sesshoumaru had matured; Inuyasha realised that this was a future version of his brother.

"Feh!" Inuyasha was aware that Sesshoumaru was inspecting him closely, sniffing at his scent and it started to unnerve the hanyou.

"Forgive me Inuyasha; but I was not so experienced with pups as I am now, when I let you go in the past to come here. It was also so very soon after your ordeals and I just wanted to reassure myself that you are well."

"I'm O.K. Well when I get my stupid emotions under control, it…it must be left over from being human still. I'm sorry I don't really cry all the time."

"I fully understand Inuyasha; truly I do, my pups are no different. Do not forget you belong now and do not have to hide who you are anymore." He then gave a quick swipe of his tongue over his brother's new mark to reinforce his words; making Inuyasha gasp at the still strange sensation, even as he allowed it to ease his tension. But Inuyasha dragged his dignity back around him like a cloak making his brother smile to himself.

"I'm not a pup anymore though Sesshoumaru," he said; giving his brother a jolt as Inuyasha had not used his full name for centuries in his time.

"Inuyasha, it is seeing you like this that makes me realise just how _much _of a pup you truly are and how remarkable. I have pups older than you now who are still pups; even though I am complimented on how mature and wise they are."

"You mean..?"

"Of course I have a few who are younger as well but they are obviously mere whelps. It wasn't until my first reached your age that I first considered it though; he wanted to go and visit some friends alone. Up until that point he had always been accompanied by his siblings and the nurses; in fact usually we all went. I told him he was not yet of an age that was acceptable to be travelling on his own, certainly none of his acquaintances and friends would yet be allowed to do so.

"You however sneered at me in bitterness; for the first time in many years, and reminded me that you had defeated Naraku when you were three years younger than my son. I have never forgotten that, but it changed nothing, so forgive me when I still see you as a pup."

"Did you let him go then?"

"Certainly not, he was still too young and reckless. I have watched you here many times since you first met Kagome and wished I could help, especially with this latest problem; but I could not, we had to be reconciled first. It has caused me great sadness for you especially when I remember how we were at the time. But before you ask, I cannot and will not influence you in your decisions by telling you what is to happen; and in this I will not be swayed."

"I know Sesshoumaru and I trust you." He found to his horror more tears flood his eyes; "I don't know if I can trust Kagome again." Sesshoumaru patted the boy's hand and told him not to worry; there was plenty of time to talk with Kagome; meantime he had come to take the pair of them to his manor house where Inuyasha would have rooms set aside for him if he should want to visit the future for any length of time. Sesshoumaru had not changed his mind in the five hundred years that had passed since he made his decree.

Mama already knew of this arrangement as Sesshoumaru and Rin had made themselves known to her when Kagome went down the well the last time. They had filled her in on the history of the pair up to present, just so that she wouldn't be alarmed by the length of time Kagome was away. Mama recognised that the resolute manner of Sesshoumaru would not be swayed, and besides she could see the sense of his actions especially in the light of the letter she had received from him in the past. Kagome though was distressed; she was standing in the doorway and had overheard Inuyasha.

"You don't mean that do you Inuyasha? Please tell me you trust me."

"No Kagome; I trust Sesshoumaru, I have to learn to trust you again. I'm sorry." He turned to his brother again to hide his face and to not be faced with Kagome's upset. Before there could be any dramatic scenes however, Sesshoumaru ushered Inuyasha back in the house forcing Kagome to follow them into the kitchen where Mama and Rin were waiting. Inuyasha was still awkward around Rin but it was getting more natural to accept her as family and he managed a slight smile.

There was a lot to settle in the time that Sesshoumaru in the past had allotted his brother; it was established that Kagome's job was still open to her courtesy of this time's Daiyoukai, and there was a surprise for Inuyasha. Mama had a purse that was fat with money; Grandfather had passed to the specialist shop more of the things Inuyasha had made and had left at the shrine. She gave it to Inuyasha but he handed it back to her; now knowing there was plenty for Kagome to use while she was here and enough to spare, especially as it was deemed more sensible that she moved back into her old room in the shrine.

The next day the whole Higurashi family was invited to the Western Manor so they could see for themselves that Inuyasha would indeed be very comfortable staying here on his visits. However Mama knew that this was a home just for Inuyasha and his brother and Rin. None of the future family was introduced at this time. The manor was small but cosy and there was a good supply of woodland that went with it in the grounds; Sesshoumaru knew well how much Inuyasha needed the familiarity of the outdoor forestation.

The final gift that Inuyasha was given by his brother was a small necklace which he could wear or not as suited him. But it held a concealment charm that covered his youkai features perfectly and making him look as he did on the moonless night whenever he wore it.

"These have been available to all the young ones born for over a century now, although they are not offered until a child is born; that way only those who truly need them will know of their existence."

"So Kagome needn't have worried about our pups?"

"No, but I'm afraid there was no way our laws would have allowed her to know before pups were due and while you travelled through the well we could not risk letting you know either, or at least not until you knew we were still here. I'm sorry that none of this could have been avoided from that point of view."

They spent Inuyasha's last day all together as well; it was a nice hot day so they spent it at the water park and then went to a fine restaurant for a final meal before returning the hanyou through the well to where his brother was waiting for him. Sesshoumaru had sent Rin and the baby home with an escort and Ah-Un just so that he could have the time alone with Inuyasha. Rin had suggested that Inuyasha still needed his brother's attention if he was still a pup, and they could build a relationship better if she wasn't always there.

This had made perfect sense to Sesshoumaru as he remembered hating to have to share his father with anyone else when he was a youth. He could also tell that she was correct in her assumption by the way Inuyasha's eyes shone when he realised he would have his sibling's undivided attention. As they set off for the Western Lands, Sesshoumaru gently coaxed Inuyasha to talk and by the time they reached the Palace, he had learned a lot more about his younger brother's earlier life.

In the future however Kagome was left alone and even though she knew she would see Inuyasha again soon, she missed him. By the next day and back at work, Kagome was trying to think how she could regain Inuyasha's trust and how long it would take. She would ask Sesshoumaru and Rin later on that evening as she and her mother had been invited out to dinner and this Sesshoumaru didn't alarm her as much as the one in the past; probably because he was older and wiser himself.

The Daiyoukai had booked a private room at a hotel for their meal as he knew that Kagome would wish to speak in private and too, he had things to say. So after the enjoyable meal and surprisingly easy chat and good company from Rin and Sesshoumaru; hearing about their pups and swapping stories, it was time for coffee and liqueurs. As they relaxed digesting their meal, Sesshoumaru glanced quickly at Mama catching her eye and her small nod, and leaned forward to speak to Kagome.

"Miko I know you have questions regarding Inuyasha but I must ask you to listen to me seriously first." Sesshoumaru received a nod of affirmation before he proceeded."How much do you know of Inuyasha's Inu make-up Kagome?"

"I don't know specifically; I don't really think about it, Inuyasha is just Inuyasha to me."

"Yes, this is because you are a product of this more _enlightened _age. You personally have no prejudices and accepted him as he was immediately. But unlike someone with a different coloured skin nowadays, Inuyasha is the product of two different creatures."

"I understand that but he is still himself."

"My main point is that he is Inu more than human, so when he thinks and acts he is motivated first by his Inu heritage that is tempered with his human heart. He is not an animal, a domesticated dog or any such; but the Inu Youkai does possess certain traits or instincts that are common to our lower kind."

"He is certainly stubborn." She said attempting to lighten the mood but it fell flat as Sesshoumaru merely stared at her although he nodded in agreement.

"He is also loyal to a fault; and able to trust to a great degree, besides being sensitive to a loved one's physical and emotional welfare. All these things are inherent in Inuyasha; he is unable to be any different and yet you required him to live here only as a human. Wanting him to understand your life, while not making allowances for his, was a fool's way of thinking for both of you. Inuyasha _needs_ to protect you; he is possessive by nature, not in the human way but the Inu's.

"You wanted him to conform to a human way of life after only a relatively few visits from the past for him. He understands very little of this time and how people live; he doesn't know what is dangerous by nature or accident and you expected him to act as if he should know all of these things and were ashamed of his heritage in a way you never were in the past."

"I was not ashamed of him; I've never been ashamed…" She stopped herself as she noticed the cold look on both Sesshoumaru's and Rin's faces.

"A word of caution Kagome, I meant it when I say you have to start again. Stop giving excuses for your actions; you are still acting like an egotistical child instead of a sensible loving woman or mate. It is me you have to prove yourself to, not my brother. There is nothing wrong with having fears and doubts; but you tried to pass the blame for the way you handled them. Inuyasha can tell you are still not being honest with yourself or him, his youkai can feel it and he will become bewildered and you will never regain his trust.

"You are a pure Miko with a huge soul; surely you can see the truth and stop deceiving yourself. But beware, I mean this; if you keep trying to justify all your actions and not take responsibility for them, you will lose him forever. I will not see him trying to be something he is not, because he is being made to feel unwanted as he is. I did enough of that to him myself and at the moment Inuyasha is still full of self doubt because of my words and behaviour, let alone yours."

Sesshoumaru finished speaking; he had not sounded harsh or cruel, but he had been very firm and determined, it was imperative if Kagome was to take stock. There were no tears although her eyes were watering; it was as if the things he said were an epiphany for her especially when he outright admitted that he too had caused harm without trying to excuse or give reasons.

Kagome would have never seen the reasons behind the torment of a smaller child by an older one and Sesshoumaru had not offered any. If the Lord of the Western Lands could humble himself to admit forthright that he had been in the wrong, so could she; as she suddenly saw the truth in his words about how she had acted. She could honestly say her motives were not to humiliate Inuyasha and that she loved him but she was beginning to see how her actions had hurt him and her wealth of excuses was dwindling to nothing.

It would take a lot longer to mull over all this in her mind but she would do so. Sesshoumaru could see the resolve in her eyes and allowed his face to show approval and understanding. Kagome was strong; she could take self analysis and redeem her love for Inuyasha, she would work hard and win him back and learn that his instincts were just as valid to his being, as hers were.

In her bed that night, she thought many things over, snippets of the conversation came to her and she realised that Rin too had been giving her something to think about. Her tales of the way the pups always blamed each other or that great trickster Mr Nobody, for things that got broken or lost; and how the parents finally realised that the pups were growing up when they would freely admit something had been their fault and ask how could they fix the problem.

Mama too had agreed with these tales, adding her own experiences and now Kagome put it all together and knew that they had planned this evening just to help her learn. It was sobering for her and very painful, but then Inuyasha had also gone through so much pain because of her; the tears came as she vowed to make it up with him and never forget the lessons she had learned.

During the rest of the week she had ample time to reflect and although she could sometimes get angry at the way she had been treated, her sense of honesty forced her to see the harsh truth and grow with it. By the following Friday she was torn between her great desire to see Inuyasha again and her apprehension. Kagome knew that she couldn't carry on trying to make up with the hanyou without clearing the air between them, and yet she knew it would hurt to drag up the old wounds.

As she reached the other side of the time slip later that afternoon, everything was different; there was no red sleeved hand to pull her up although she had not had that for a long time, she had thought he would be there to welcome her. Instead, was a guard of Inus with Ah-Un saddled and ready for her to ride; it took a bare two hours to get to the Western Palace.

A room had been prepared for her and Sesshoumaru informed her that it was hers for as long as she was visiting; she could decorate it in any way she wished and there were maids who would always attend her when she was with them. Kagome was treated as an honourable guest and yet she felt apart; there was a time when she could have been treated as family. As she was escorted to the dining hall, she noticed many other guests and overheard the talk about the eligible young Lord of the West.

Inuyasha was obviously no longer the outcast of the family; his acceptance by Sesshoumaru had drawn him to the attention of the rest of the nobles with their own eligible daughters. Many of the girls were flitting around like the social butterflies they were and Kagome felt drab next to them. Most knew that Inuyasha was the defeater of Naraku, but none had equated the little human as the Miko of the same legend. Before she reached the dining area however she was pulled unceremoniously into a small room by none other than Inuyasha.

He looked so different; he was well cared for, with his hair shining and tied up in a knot just as his father used to wear and his kimono was similar to Sesshoumaru's, only the sleeves were decorated in a midnight blue. He took her breath away as he looked at her with his huge shining golden eyes; and she fell on her knees before him and held both his hands in her own.

"Get up wench; watch'ya doing down there?"

"Inuyasha, I'm here because until I've said sorry, I won't be able to talk to you. Please believe me when I say I never meant to hurt you; but my intention doesn't matter because I did hurt you and I've been blaming all sorts of things except the real one, which was me. I did everything wrong, never took into account how you saw things and didn't talk to you, I took all the decisions to myself and I was very wrong, it was not how a mate should act. I know it is going to be hard to forgive me but I beg you to try; I love you Inuyasha so very much."

Inuyasha said nothing at first but pulled her to her feet. His inward dilemmas were quiet for once; all his separate parts had accepted the truth of what she said, he could tell the honesty and his heart was at peace. Perhaps he could begin to trust her words again and not worry that she might say one thing but do another; he found that to be so confusing.

"Feh! Come on get up. We are all starting again here; there has been too much suffering to just be able to catalogue and forgive, it had to be a clean start or not bother. So you want that we should start again Kagome? It has to be complete honesty from all of us to work."

"Please Inuyasha."

"Then I forgive you and we don't bring it up again to hurt someone with." Inuyasha turned as Sesshoumaru came in;

"You understand Miko that sometimes Inuyasha has to speak about the past; he still has nightmares but it is he who insisted that we now draw on a clean page. If you wish to join us in creating a harmonious family, you will be welcome in the terms we outlined before; at least you did not intend to cause harm unlike myself, therefore if Inuyasha can forgive my transgressions I am sure he can do yours."

"I'm starving; are we done with all this talk?

"You are always hungry Little Brother; but you are correct, it is time for us all to progress."

TBC


	8. Stepping Stones

Chapter 8 Stepping Stones

The social dinner that evening was an eye-opener for several of the diners; Sesshoumaru escorted Rin in to dinner followed by Inuyasha with a lovely Inu youkai female, while the girl's brother escorted Kagome. The food of course was excellent and many dishes were entirely suitable for the two human women; there was plenty of small talk and to Kagome's surprise Inuyasha was not staying silent or surly in company, he was speaking to his companion answering her questions shyly and politely.

Later after the meal, guests were encouraged to walk outside in the gardens; it being a lovely evening and plenty of lanterns lit the pathways. Kagome watched as various young females and males clustered round the reserved hanyou who was making his debut in society. Inuyasha was finding his own delight in these youths who were genuinely interested in his history without becoming snobbish when they found out his background. In fact it seemed to make him a very romantic figure and they clamoured for more of his tales.

Sesshoumaru was amused; Inuyasha was no older and in many cases he was younger than these children of his main guests, but the pup had never been sheltered and his life had been so much harder that he seemed years older. But it didn't matter; it gave Sesshoumaru the opportunity he had been waiting for, Inuyasha was becoming part of the Western Life, almost ready to take up his position as a Western Lord. Acceptance in his own time would make it far harder for Inuyasha to leave for Kagome's; something Sesshoumaru would have refused to allow, but if Inuyasha wanted to stay of his own accord, it would save any temper tantrums.

Inuyasha was amazed at the acceptance he found among these higher youkai and not just the younger ones, but their parents as well. He had thought he would be outcast still, even if he was now welcome in the West; he had assumed that he would be made to eat in his quarters at these events, so as not to compromise Sesshoumaru's position as he'd always been told he had done in the past.

Now he was beginning to understand that although many lower youkai despised hanyou, it was by no means universal; and he was more than tolerated because of his own deeds and high birth. For a while he was greatly saddened; knowing as he did now that Sesshoumaru had hated him for himself and not his filthy blood so much and he couldn't help wonder again what it would have been like to grow up under his brother's love and not his hatred.

Many times during that party season the sadness would catch him unawares and he would leave the new friends he had made, needing to seek the privacy of his own room; but Sesshoumaru could smell the tears and wouldn't let his brother brood, he would lick the boy's pack mark asthey laid to rest many old wounds and grew closer. Sesshoumaru was always nearby when this misery overtook Inuyasha; Rin reminded him that the boy needed him alone sometimes, without the rest of the family.

A couple of weeks later Inuyasha was getting more settled in his new home and lifestyle and his aura was more balanced for much longer periods. One evening when Sesshoumaru could tell that his young brother was quite happy and relaxed he came up behind him and put his hand to the delicate neck and his elongated fangs at the boy's throat. Inuyasha instinctively froze, he could scent the Dokkasso from his brother's claws and feel them pinch his neck; and he cursed himself for the scent of fear that he knew Sesshoumaru could smell.

"Inuyasha; are you ready to die?" Sesshoumaru growled menacingly; letting his hot breath scorch his brother's throat and causing his eyes to shine with a luminous ruby colour, knowing that at this moment he looked exactly the lethal predator he truly was. The involuntary fear from his brother was welcome to him even though he had to keep his youkai under firm control. But the boy was nothing if not brave and he would not go down without a fight.

"Gerroff me bastard; wadd'ya think yer doing? Inuyasha had reverted back to his less refined speech, Sesshoumaru idly noted; as he had also noticed that the pup was still fighting his fear. The older brother was not allowing Inuyasha any movement at all, the claws dangerously near his jugular made sure of that.

"You are such an ungrateful whelp. I promised that I would offer you this, after I revived you against your wishes a month ago; do you not remember?"

"Damn Sesshoumaru; I thought…"

"You thought I had been deceiving you for all of this time?"

"It…crossed my mind; I'm sorry."

"I still await your answer, Inuyasha."

"No, I don't want to die right now Sesshoumaru; thank you. You said it would be painless; there was no way you would have made all that painless."

"No; had I ripped out your throat or poisoned you slowly or even both of those things there would have been undoubted pain, but I can be painless too."

"You _tricked_ me; you did it on purpose…to make me say no?"

"To be **certain** you would say no."

"I still might have said yes, what would you have done then?" Inuyasha pouted like a child in his relief and Sesshoumaru smirked in a way that made his brother uneasy.

"I would have upended you over my knee and spanked your bared backside into giving me a more congenial answer. In fact I might do so anyway for doubting the purity of my intentions and the disrespect in your speech, in any case." It was more enjoyable having a younger brother around to tease than Sesshoumaru would have ever known, if he had not made his peace with Inuyasha.

"You wouldn't dare." Inuyasha was aghast.

"I assure you that if I had been prepared to threaten your life several times, besides beating you so cruelly in the past; I am certainly capable of disciplining you should the need arise Inuyasha, so be warned pup."

"You said you wouldn't hurt me again."

"I believe I said I wouldn't _harm_ you again whelp, but I am not averse to causing you a little _pain_ if the occasion warranted it Inuyasha; it is in your hands." The smirk grew and Inuyasha fled, although when he reflected on the way Sesshoumaru had acted towards him, the hanyou felt safe in a strange way and pleased that his brother obviously still cared and wanted him around.

His relationship with Rin improved over time, especially with her in the future; she was very wise and loving and didn't force his friendship, but welcomed any overture he made. While he was in the future he made more things to sell and soon built an exclusive clientele interested in his expressive creations. He always gave the money to Kagome and couldn't be persuaded to keep it for himself or allow it to grow in a bank account or investments. He would rather she were able to pay her way at the shrine and have new clothes.

It was something she had to learn, Inuyasha was the provider and it made him happy to do so. Mama suggested the compromise; Kagome could use Inuyasha's money for spending and save her own and any left from his. As this was quite a large sum each month, she asked for Sesshoumaru's help in investing it; this he did, approving of her methods and understanding in a way Inuyasha did not as yet, the importance of saving. But as long as Kagome had nice things and Mama did not go without, Inuyasha didn't care what they did with the money he earned; as long as it was used.

They spent time together but never completely alone; Inuyasha was learning about the time Kagome lived in with the help of everyone else, it helping that Sesshoumaru often knew how to prevent a problem for him before it happened. And so the pair began to learn what it meant to be human and hanyou together. When he was back in the past Inuyasha never mentioned that he was living with his brother and his mate in the future; and neither did Sesshoumaru and Rin broach the subject either, although both knew they had contact, their scents lingered around Inuyasha very strongly.

Besides Inuyasha was not always consistent in how he acted with Rin, sometimes he was still shy albeit a bit brotherly and another he was almost like her son; this was quite disarming for the still young Rin, until Sesshoumaru explained to her what he thought was happening with Inuyasha. Sesshoumaru could project how he felt he would behave towards the couple in the future fairly accurately; he had no need to confirm or deny his suspicions with Inuyasha.

In fact he was certain that he was in charge in Kagome's time too; after all, the Miko's mother was human and therefore had to be very young in comparison to him and only relatively experienced in life. He also had his suspicions that the woman was probably only a slight influence on her daughter's behaviour now at least; from what Inuyasha said, she was mainly mild tempered and loved the pup as if he were her son. It seemed that the younger of her two offspring was more like her than her fiery determined daughter. All in all he was smugly confident that nothing would get by him in the future any more than it did now.

So over the next couple of years, Kagome and Inuyasha courted one another again under the eagle eyes of Sesshoumaru on both sides of the well. It was not all plain sailing however; Inuyasha had been formally introduced as the Second Lord of the West to his peers and had accepted the authority hesitantly, but gladly. That meant that he was now resident at the Western Palace by right and by need therefore Kagome had to make a long trip twice every weekend just to visit. Sometimes of course Inuyasha would spend time with her though and then he stayed at the little manor with Sesshoumaru and Rin.

And in that time Kagome and Inuyasha were subjected to tests that Sesshoumaru devised, although neither of them was aware of these. They were not hard tests as such; for Kagome it was of endurance, she was expected to understand that if she was committed to Inuyasha she would spend every weekend and holiday with him. As their relationship progressed this would be more important to Inuyasha's youkai if it started to contemplate her as a mate again. It would be a test of her growing understanding of the hanyou's nature.

In the future time Sesshoumaru was still doing the same tests; often Kagome was invited by friends and colleagues out at the weekend but she never went or was tempted. Once however there was a family outing to a high class restaurant and a box at a show; this was deliberately contrived by Sesshoumaru and sprung on them at the last minute but Kagome came through, she didn't even hint that she was sorry that she had to go to see Inuyasha instead. She realised that Inuyasha would understand if she missed a week, but he would still be disappointed and that was something she never wanted to be the cause of again.

The opportunity of fine dinners and shows could be repeated; but her time with Inuyasha could not, and she had already lost him once and didn't wish to give him reason to worry or be concerned that she no longer wanted him. He had never complained when she went out with her friends before, although it had obviously been a problem for him; Kagome was only fully realising now how much Inuyasha had always put her needs or wants above his own.

Kagome was genuinely ashamed of how little she had recognised Inuyasha's differences were, because he _was_ different in make up to a human. It seemed so ridiculous not to have realised it, but that was the truth, too often Inuyasha was considered by herself and her friends in the past as a type of super human; not respecting the youkai in him by disregarding it, unless it caused them concern. She was determined to change that, even though she knew there were things that she couldn't change about the past.

Inuyasha's tests were different; Sesshoumaru made certain to have plenty of the younger youkai friends of his little brother around. They were welcome to visit him whenever, including when Kagome was away during the week. Inuyasha came to enjoy the times he could be a normal young hanyou with friends and even more astonishing to him was that he was considered attractive by many of the girls. As they were all youkai, in whole or in part he was able to tell that they were genuine when they wanted his company. Scent and hearing were superior in the Inu so he could tell if there was any deceit in how they responded to him.

The pup was astounded but soon understood what it meant to be popular as he was not conceited and was still engagingly shy; although he was also proving somewhat shrewd in matters pertaining to his occupation as Second Lord. This test was to see whether or not Inuyasha would show interest in any of his young friends; Sesshoumaru was concerned that because the boy had been so socially deprived, he had fallen in love with the first two people who had shown him kindness since his mother passed on.

Now he was able to freely see others in the light of a mate if he so desired; several of the girls had been blatant about their own interest in him. Sesshoumaru smiled when he thought of this; Kagome too had quickly seen the options for Inuyasha now but he had to admit, she had never tried to stop any of his friends which meant she was learning. She also no longer used her tears as blackmail; being more often in the company of the infinitely more mature in her ways Rin, was improving Kagome and helping to show her that she was no longer a girl but a full grown woman.

Inuyasha however remained unmoved by any of the girls in a sexual way, even though he had to be aware of their interest; after all Sesshoumaru had also paid attention to his brother's physical responses and noticed that he was still loyal to Kagome. His youkai and his human attributes had chosen the Miko long before and now she was proving her worth in Sesshoumaru's eyes.

He had to admit that she passed his tests and if he would rather Inuyasha found a mate from one of the youkai girls, he could only blame himself for not giving his brother all the opportunities he should have had from childhood. Had the hanyou always had a home in the West he would never have met Kikyou and been sealed, only to be freed by Kagome and fall in love with the human.

But it had not happened thus and now their paths were set and Inuyasha asked Sesshoumaru for permission to re mate Kagome three years after his life had been saved. The Lord of the West could not refuse nor did he wish to in reality; they were a good match and all he said as a rider to his affirmation was that he would be still taking a careful interest in his brother's life, wherever his brother happened to be at the time. The hanyou had a huge heart to match the Miko's huge soul and Sesshoumaru would make sure that it stayed happy and beating to the best of his ability.

THE END.


End file.
